Soft Skills Engineering

Episode 359: Competition and awkward in person


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In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:

  1. Hi Dave and Jamison!

    What do you do when one of your immediate teammates is constantly competing against you?

    I really don’t like competition. Ignoring the competitiveness + praising his value did not work.

    Some examples:

    • Leaving code reviews comments showing off obvious knowledge which does not really add value to the PR
    • Constantly harassing you to pair on trivial matters (I think because “pairing with someone less experienced” is a trait desirable in our engineer scoring framework)
    • Picking up a bigger version of whatever ticket you just did
    • Trying to be the first to “answer your question” in public without actually answering the question (this makes it difficult for me to actually get answer for question I ask because other would think it’s “resolved”)
    • Part of me feels flattered that somebody who has more years in the job sees me as worthy of competing against, but at some point it became annoying and counterproductive.

      Appreciate your thoughts. Please don’t tell me quitting my job and saying goodbye once and for all is the solution😂

    • I am graduating this year and have received two job offers. They are both very similar in terms of pay and benefits, the only difference is that one is fully remote and the other is hybrid (2x a week in person).

      I would normally jump on the chance to work remotely, mainly due to the fact I am a bit socially awkward and shy. However, I am conflicted if I should accept the hybrid offer as an opportunity to work on my social skills and experience working in an office sooner rather than later.

      Should I just accept that my personality isn’t suited for in-person? Have you ever had anyone on your team be socially awkward/shy? How did you feel about them?

      PS. Have you guys ever thought of releasing merch? I’d love to buy a “space lawyers tshirt”. Thanks!!!

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      Soft Skills EngineeringBy Jamison Dance and Dave Smith

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