DISCovering You

Conflict Styles


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What do sharks, owls, teddy bears, turtles, and foxes have to do with conflict?

In this episode, Victoria dives into the fascinating world of conflict management styles using the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (TKI). With honesty, humour, and a little vulnerability, they uncover how each of them instinctively responds when tension rises.

The Academy Awards are coming up, so you know what this means… DISC as OSCARS nominated films!

High D – One Battle After Another: High stake conflict, intense energy

High I – F1: Fun, thrilling

High S – Hamnet: Familial relationships, emotional depth

High C – The Secret Agent: Layered details, deductive reasoning

Which one do you think will win?

The conversation shifts into something deeper: How do you actually handle disagreement? Do you power through it? Smooth it over? Walk away? Or try to meet in the middle?

You’ll hear:

  1. A breakdown of all five conflict styles (Competing, Collaborating, Accommodating, Avoiding, Compromising)
  2. How assertiveness and cooperation shape your reactions
  3. Real-life reflections on boundaries, people-pleasing, and “Is this a hill I want to die on?”
  4. Why no style is inherently good or bad — and how awareness gives you options

If conflict drains you, confuses you, or sometimes defines you, this episode will help you recognize your default patterns — and empower you to respond more intentionally next time.

Because understanding your style doesn’t box you in. It gives you leverage.

Episode Timestamps:

00:26 - Welcome and introduction to Discovering You podcast

00:45 - Mood check-in: Yellow (exhilarated) vs Blue (tired)

02:11 - Introduction to conflict management styles and Oscar-nominated films as DISC types

02:57 - Overview of Dr. Ralph Kilman's TKI assessment model

03:37 - Sample assessment questions walkthrough

05:31 - Revealing personal conflict style results

09:09 - Deep dive into the five conflict styles begins

12:00 - Competing style (Shark) - High assertiveness, low cooperation

13:54 - Collaborating style (Owl) - High assertiveness, high cooperation

15:25 - Accommodating style (Teddy Bear) - Low assertiveness, high cooperation

16:57 - Avoiding style (Turtle) - Low assertiveness, low cooperation

20:01 - Compromising style (Fox) - Moderate assertiveness and cooperation

21:29 - Discussion on win-win vs zero-sum mindsets in conflict

22:00 - Key takeaways: Using awareness to choose appropriate conflict styles

22:44 - Closing and credits

If you're interested in learning more about team building, coaching, strategic hiring and onboarding, let's connect!

[email protected]

https://pod.link/1614071253

https://discoverwhatworks.org/

https://www.facebook.com/VictoriaDISC

https://www.instagram.com/discoverwhatworks/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/discoverwhatworks

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DISCovering YouBy Victoria Theriault

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