Connection Alchemy

How synchronising with others builds trust, closeness, and connection.

What starts to happen when you step away from constant consumption...

This weekend on my walk with the doggo lady, I was reflecting on what consuming less and creating more has brought into my life. And why I think you should join me on this journey!

Give it a listen and let me know what YOU have been longing to create for some time now but haven’t, and why now now is the time to change that.

Looking forward to reading your reflections either in the comments or as a DM.

Whilst it seems very obvious, it is not so obvious to many people. But it is precisely the skill of questioning that will lead you to more connection in your life.

My main message for you today is to ask more questions.

Why and how I talk about in the podcast.

Enjoy!

To your belonging,

Baru

This weekend on a walk, I came up with a new idea for my podcast.

Whilsts I love the idea of interviewing people and I will keep those episodes coming.

I also have a strong need to express my thoughts about human connection out loud, and even better on a walk in the forest: for myself, for you, and for the peering eyes and ears of the passerby.

I hope they are of value to you.

On this particular walk, I explore the topic of belonging.

The topic of belonging start at 1:35.

Let me know what belonging means to you in the comments ⬇️

This episode is packed with learning! I recommend you listen to the whole thing.

Kim and I talk about navigating friendships abroad and all that comes with that:

- Making new connections

- Creating deeper bonds

- Having to say goodby to the friends that leave for another adventure

- Keeping in touch with friends that are all around the world

Do you have any awesome tips or experiences around any of those? Share them with us in the comments.

Timestamps:

0:00 - Intro

5:00 - How to make friends abroad

10:00 - How to navigate when your friends leave & managing long distance friendships

36:00 - Friendship rituals and making friendships work for your lifestyle

48:00 - Our takeaways

51:50 - Kim’s life lesson and recent challenge

Wow, what an enriching conversation. I keep being in awe with how each conversation has it’s own life. Like you can have some expectations for a conversation, but you can be sure it will take a completely different turn.

And I love the spin this conversation has taken. We talk about how it feels to leave the home country behind, about the guilt we sometimes feel when it comes to moving away from our families and missing out on the everyday moments with them, and how to navigate it all. We also share what we would do differetly next time, or what we would do exactly the same when it comes to moving countries.

A text cannot do this conversation justice. You have to give it a listen. I love learning from people who are walking similar paths and this conversation is a great example of what can come out when two people share their experiences with one another.

My biggest takeaway?

Back home, I have friends that I can really rely on, and I haven’t experienced that same connection or loyalty abroad. But thanks to this conversation I have discovered that I have just been waiting for it to happen, rather than going towards it with my intentional actions. At minute 55, we talk about how to create loyalty friendships abroad, I call it a brave loyalty, as you gotta get out of your comfort zone to get it. If you’re short on time, give at least these 5 minutes a listen, it’ll be worth it.

And what I leave you today with is this:

What does loyalty mean to you?

Let me know in the comments.

Timestamps:

0:00 - Intro

1:50 - Coming back home

5:00 - Personality change on the outside versus on the inside

12:00 - How travelling changes you (no going back, different languages, cultural differences)

21:30: - Habit creation & reinventing oneself

26:00 - How does it feel to leave the home country behind + the guilt of leaving your home behind

45:00 - How to approach moving, if you were to do it (again)

50:00 - Loyalty friends, Roots, Perspectives

55:00 - Creating loyalty in an instant, choosing people to do it with intentionally (brave loyalty)

1:00:00 - Loyalty vs. Honesty, what is true loyalty anyway?

1:03:00 - Our takeaways

PS: If you don’t have time to listen to the whole conversation, I think the end (55 minutes onward) is the most important part to listen to!

Join me for my conversation with Mai where we discuss creating new communities abroad from scratch, navigating travelling back home, and how to combine it all.

Among other smaller ones, these are my biggest insights from our conversation together:

- It’s important to create a home within you, that way you can take it with you wherever you are.

- We have a relationship with each country like we would have with a human. A countryship!

- How you feel about the country you’re in and how you feel about yourself in the country you’re in, are not always the same. Act accordingly.

0:00 - Introduction

4:40 - Navigating Travelling Between Countries

11:00 - Time Back Home & Family Expectations

20:00 - Building New Community Abroad & Adjusting to New Culture

42:00 - How Do You Decide Where to Move & Recognise If a Place Is Working for You

58:00 - Life Lesson & Life Challenge

About Mai:

Former classical pianist of 18 years and jazz radio host, Mai went on to earn her Master of Arts in Global Entertainment and Music Business from Berklee College of Music. Her career spans global roles across companies such as BeatStars, Nvak Collective, Bleav Podcast Network, Giant Noise PR, Bauer Entertainment Marketing, ONErpm APAC, SoAlive Music Conference, Vietnam Music Week, and more. She also spent two years at LIONS SHARE as a podcast producer prior to its acquisition by Jaded, and worked as Production Assistant for Friends:Forever Showcase at SXSW 2024. She now works between Asia and Europe, serving as Promoter (Intl.) for HOZO Fest in Vietnam, Editorial Assistant for Hypebeast, while in Spain, she handles International Partnerships for Kpopverse España, a community that organizes Korean culture events and sells official merchandise/albums from Kpop groups, and is a Booking Agent for Monochromo.live focusing on bringing Asian diasporic acts to Spain, Portugal and wider Europe.

Join this conversation between me and Dinara where we explore what self-development means in the life of an expat.

I personally had a great insight into the masochistic nature of expat life. But you’re gonna have to give it a listen if you want to know what the hell I am talking about.

Apart from the main focus of our conversation, we also explored questions such as these:

- What are the lessons from moving abroad?

- Can we enrich the culture we come into?

- Are all of us expat insatiable explorers?

Curious about our experiences and want to connect?

- Connect w me: https://www.instagram.com/connectionalchemy/

- Or connect w Dinara here: https://www.instagram.com/dinaracoaching/

Timestamps

00:00 - Introduction

06:30 - What self-development means in the expat life

14:30 - Reasons to move abroad & support

17:45 - Who am I now, confused identity

20:00 - What are the lessons from moving abroad

30:00 - Are we masochists?

32:00 - Homesickness & First experiences

39:00 - Time perception

40:30 - Thrill vs Stability

45:00 - Is travelling a form of development?

47:45 - Can we enrich the culture we come into?

49:00 - Are all of us expat insatiable explorers?

50:20 - Our takeaways

54:00 - Dinara’s life lesson and a challenge

Awareness… as I have come to learn, is an almighty tool that can help us improve so many areas of our life, but most specifically our relationships.

It’s nothing new, the Zen masters have known this for centuries…

But in our modern world, where your attention is what literally everyone is after, it is even more important to realise how precious it is. To be aware, and to use it well!

My goal for this podcast is to be an explorer, not an expert, and to explore how we humans connect. And my favourite way for exploring is through an honest conversation, just like this one.

If you’re curious, join us for a conversation about what role awareness plays in our relationships and our communication, and to whatever journey it takes us from there.

Together with River, we discuss:

- The crucial role of awareness and attention in our communication

- That the words we choose to use have a bigger impact than we think

- What it is to react versus to act

- The actual power of useful questions and how to dare to ask more

- Lying to oneself

- The explorer mindset over the expert mindset, and how that might serve you well in a conflict

- And of course life lessons and navigating life challenges

I have learned many things thanks to this conversation, but the two biggest ones I am taking away are these:

- Assuming we know keeps us in one place, questions are the space where growth and understanding happens.

- A truly wise person has no need to lie to themselves, thinking otherwise probably just means that you’re not as wise as you thought you were.

It was an inspiring conversation, give it a listen and let me know what are you walking away with.

Cannot wait to read your reflections!

Connect with River here: https://wordsthatwork.substack.com/?utm_campaign=profile_chips

Timestamps:

1:00 - About River

3:00 - Awareness, attention & questions

20:00 - Words and tones we use have an impact, intention, assumptions

32:55 - Lying to oneself & true intelligence

41:00 - Is there such a thing as a stupid question?

47:00 - How to get better at communicating

48:00 - Confrontation is never the right way, understanding is

01:03:00 - Life lessons, Life Challenge & Last Message

You’ve been there… Someone introduces themselves for the first time, you would swear that they have mentioned what their name was, but for the love of your mum you just cannot remember it when you need it, even if they offered you money for it.

In this episode, you will find out why you should up your name game and how to do it in a way that’s easy and works wonders no matter how good you are at remembering names right now.

And at the next party, you’ll finally be the one who rocks the names.

Give it a listen and let me know how it went!

TIMESTAMPS

0:00 – Why Remembering People’s Names Matters

5:24 – Practical Strategies to Actually Remember Names

16:00 – Bonus Tips: What to Do With Tricky or Foreign Names + Making Your Name Memorable