This week is our first CONTEST episode! Without further ado, we're going to let DINK DIRKLEY tell you what's going on...Dink?

DINK DIRKLEY: Hola Muchachos! Dink here, to tell you about an excellent contest Behrens House of Chaos is promoting! They have five "What Am I?" questions, and if you are the lucky one to answer more than Katt did (heh) you could win a $25 egift card to Walmart or Amazon! Here's your questions:

1: When I go in, I can cause some pain. I'll fill your holes when you ask me to. I also ask that you spit not swallow. What am I?

2: What gets longer when it's pulled, fits snugly between breasts, slides neatly into a hole, chokes people when used incorrectly and works well when jerked?

3: What's soft and wet on the inside , while hard and hairy on the outside? The word begins with "C" ends in "T" and there's a "U" and an "N" between them?

4: What goes in dry and hard but comes out wet and soft?

5: Over 1,000 people went down on me, I wasn't a maiden for long. Something really big and hard ripped me open. What am I?

So listen to the episode, think HARD and LONG about these questions, remember NO CHEATING, and ENJOY!

This contest is not promoted by Walmart or Amazon.

Send entries to [email protected]

Winner will be announced on the May 7th episode.