At long last, the recipe I (mis)remembered for over 20 years, and the main reason I was bound and determined to track down the book again. The recipe couldn't be simpler: cook some bacon, crumble it, top iceberg lettuce with the bacon (or spinach: my mismemory used spinach, and it really does taste better) and shredded cheddar, then mix lemon juice (from a lemon, not a bottle) into the bacon grease and pour this over the salad as a dressing. Simple, unhealthy, and delicious, just what a salad should be.

Sadly, I was out of real bacon, as well as either spinach or iceberg. My subbing in romaine was fine (though the lettuce was slightly wilted), but turkey bacon produces no grease so I had to cook it in some oil and neither the meat nor the dressing was nearly as good as it would have been had I used proper bacon. Hmm, guess trying to wing it at the last minute without making proper preparations is unwise, and that is just about the most boring story moral of all time.