We know that loving relationships are a key to our physical, emotional and spiritual health.  Did you catch that?  Our physical... health.  Not just our emotional health.  And our spiritual health too.
These are 5 strategies to help create friendships several of which come from the workbook "Finding Strength In the Lord: Emotional Resilience".

#1 To start out we take a look at improving our listening skills --specifically through prayer.  

In the Self Reliance course: Emotional Resilience, there is a section on prayer in the Building Healthy Relationships chapter.   It has a 4 step chart on listening skills.  

These skills sound like something you would practice on a human being that you are with.  But the chart is placed in the prayer section for when you are speaking with Deity.  These steps to listening include watching body language and not interrupting.  Much can be learned -- and practiced-- by employing these steps while praying.

#2 Have genuine interest in other people.  Not feigned.  And even when you don't share their interests.  This is a different focus than the approach of trying to find someone with the same interests as you.  This helps you broaden your capacity to know and understand many more people.

#3 Smile.  It feels good to have someone smile at you.  It can create an immediate connection with another human.

#4 Switching "you" sentences to "I" sentences.  Such as "You always interrupt me when I am trying to go over the family schedule.  You look at your phone or you act like you didn't even hear me."  This can be changed to "I feel dismissed when you look at your phone while I talk to you."  

Changing it to an "I" sentence does two things.  1) It keeps you from getting into a blaming mindset and 2) It helps you become aware of what you are feeling.  

#5 Focus on the other person as being important.  Even imagine them as being smart.  Everyone is smart about something and we can learn something from everyone we meet.

This strategy employs the golden rule.  We all like to feel important-- like what we say matters.  Allow others this gift of being heard and their voice being valued.

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