If you can’t laugh with your spouse, you’re missing out on one of God’s greatest tools for restoration. In our latest episode, Stan Shelby discusses the vital role of a sense of humor in navigating the stress, conflict, and routine of daily life.

As an elementary school teacher, Stan knows the difference between being funny and being silly. While silliness can sometimes be disruptive, true humor acts as a bonding agent. It releases oxytocin (the bonding chemical) and builds a deeper friendship that makes a marriage resilient.

Stan shares a hilarious story from a family yacht trip in Florida. One of his brothers, not realizing where the dock ended in the dark, walked right off the platform and into the water with a giant splash.

Once the family knew he was safe, they didn’t just move on—they laughed for two years! Stan points out that sharing these “remember when” moments keeps a couple connected. Even a week ago, a simple text of a photo from that night had Stan and his brother John laughing until they were “choked up and crying” on the phone.

It Diffuses Conflict: Humor can de-escalate an argument and turn a potential fight into a moment of shared connection.

It Strengthens the Emotional Bond: Couples who laugh together view each other as best friends, which is a major factor in marital longevity.

It’s a Coping Mechanism: Stan and Cynthia have faced financial hurdles, the challenges of raising two “polar opposite” children, and health scares. Their secret? They chose to “count it all joy” and find the humor in the mundane rather than letting the stress drown them.

Physical & Mental Health: Laughter is a natural tranquilizer. It reduces cortisol (stress hormone) and improves heart health.

Study Your Spouse: Learn what makes them laugh—is it slapstick, wit, or situational humor?

Be Intentional: Laughter doesn’t always happen naturally in a busy life. Watch a clean comedian (Stan recommends Sinbad!) or share funny memes to create joy.

Laugh at Yourself: Don’t be so serious. When you make a mistake, laugh about it instead of getting defensive.

Avoid Mean-Spirited Humor: Humor should never come at the expense of your partner’s self-esteem. If it tears them down, it’s not funny.

Laughter is a gift that keeps the “ship rolling” through every storm. As Stan reminds us, a merry heart does good like a medicine. So, this weekend, find something to laugh about with your spouse and watch the stress levels drop!

What’s the last thing that made you and your spouse laugh until you cried? Share the joy and listen to Stan’s full episode for more “healing” humor!