This week, U.K. taxidermist Josh Fisher pub casts a mackerel head and runs from the cops, we invoke the Magna Carta to stop vegan girls from killing crows, chase toothy predators with the four lures available in our country, and turn a bag of rotten chubs into something worthy of Buckingham Palace.

This week, renowned biologist Shan O’Gorman teaches us how to grow huge bass while dodging bullets, we give up on wild browns because we can’t afford the water bill, trespass our way to a $28 grand prize, and hopelessly clog up a bunch of fishy corn holes.

This week, Kevin Jarnigan of “Gun Talk” puts down his gat and picks up a poorly designed spinnerbait, we hook a gator on a Spook and barely make it through the inlet, lose $5,000 on a vintage trucker hat, and race for a Big Mac after slicing palm spikes out of our feet.

Bob “The Garbage Man” exposes “big fluorocarbon” and proposes regulations that would put more molten lead in the hands of American children.

This week, Orvis’s Tom Rosenbauer and Shawn Combs take a claw hammer to a redfish skull and get drunk with carp envy, we get high on boiled peanuts and try tie to striper flies, trade expensive gear for an inflatable doll, and figure out where Bob Ross hid all the bodies.

This week, Joe joins his best bud, Mark Wizeman, at deer camp to hunt for Queen Elsa and provide muzzleloader support, we don shark socks and chase brown trout with shovels, drain a bottle of bourbon while catching a walleye we don’t want, and rip a rainbow canoe apart with our bare hands.

This week, veteran Vermont fisheries biologist Shawn Good counts every minnow and takes a slap shot at DIY fish stockers, we ruin a perfectly good walleye bite by introducing a lack of common sense, sue a jet skier for ruining our bug zapper, and deep fry a whole bunch of largemouths to prove everyone would rather freeze for minuscule perch.

This week, the honorable Nate P. angles on the Black Sabbath and shows us where the bodies are floating, we catch the world’s smallest steelhead and the biggest pit viper carp, have a terrible shaving accident while infusing dough bait with fear, and feed Tuna Helper to obnoxious squirrels.

This week, Jim Fee leaves his family at the zoo to trespass with teenagers, we prepare our dads to have their arms ripped off in a foreign country, soak Kool-Aid infused chicken for frozen trout, and wood chop our way to disappointment at the drainage pipe.

This week, Captain Eric Kerber, “Neighbor” Steve McIntyre, and Matt Farrell ring in the New Year by lying about chain pickerel, we turn our kids into blood-thirsty fish killers, inject adrenaline right into our hearts to stop a glide bait overdose, and book a UFO sight-seeing cruise because it’s cheaper than a tuna trip.