Episode 2: A disappointment

After a surprisingly great first episode, the second was surprisingly bad. It felt like this was a placeholder episode where nothing happens. Catherine and Vincent argue a lot about information we know she'll find out anyway. A sister is introduced which ruins the idea that Cat is a brooding loner who feels like she doesn't fit in her own life. If her sister is there all the time, how will she be lonely and driven? Maybe they were trying to match JT and Vincent to Cat and Heather, but Cat already has Tess so this seems unnecessary. Hopefully something interesting happens with this sister soon to get her out of the best friend role. A rather unsatisfying mystery is solved entirely by Tess, since Cat is too busy getting saved by Vincent to help. The doctor is moving more towards the love triangle role (he even mentions a love triangle!) contrary to my hopes. There wasn't much good about this episode.

The only parts I found interesting were the Muirfield involvements. Erasing all the files off her computer was a sweet move. If they really want to kill her they should stop sending one assassin at a time though. I wish they weren't afraid to have Catherine kill people she fights. Even in the first subway fight the one man who dies runs into the other guys knife so she has no blame! I really think this might be a gender issue. Arrow kills lots of bad guy goons and apparently that's ok because he's a guy. I wonder if Vincent had to save her partly so he would be the one to kill the assassin. Either way, Cat should have kicked that guys ass with no help from anyone!

I don't know why the second episode was so weak but I hope the preview for the next one isn't misleading. It looks much better, getting into the Muirfield stuff a lot more. I'll look forward to that and hope episode 2 was an exception. With only 13 episodes in the first season, it was silly to waste this one on nothing happening. The first episode set me up with high hopes, don't let me down CW.

Beauty and the Beast episode 2 is called Proceed with Caution, which is what you should do if you choose to watch it. Caution being copious amounts of your favorite adult beverage.

We're introduced to Cat's sister Heather. Sweet Heather is a young, innocent, doe-eyed lady who just wants to put their Mother's UNSOLVED murder behind them, and gets annoyed at Cat when she brings it up.  "Mom's case has been closed for 9 years." Heather says. Wait, what 9 years? Damn those cops give up fast, wasn't she murdered 9 years ago? I guess Muirfield was better at covering things up back in the day. This could also work toward our theory that Cat's whole family was in on the hit.

Beauty and the Beast also treats us to some playful banter between the whole team of detectives and medical examiner as they show up to the case of the evening. We get a flirty push between Examiner Sexy and Sexy Cat. Then Partner Sexy tells them to just get it on, Chris Farley style, she then tells Sexy Cat "some amount of my brothers met their wives on the job." Then Angry Sexy Boss shows up and says, "Now how about meeting your victim." In this case the victim is the viewer.

After all their sexy talk they find a ballerina has been murdered and begin a Blues Clues/Myth Busters like investigation of the crime scene. It's all very procedural. Until Sexy Beast shows up on a sexy rooftop, and gives Sexy Cat a sexy bear hug from behind. As creeper friends do. Then Sexy Cat asks him about her mother. The dialogue is something like this:

Sexy Cat: Tell me about my mother's death.

Vinny B. Sexy: No, ask me sexier and angrier.

Sexy Cat (in upset sexy voice): Tell me who killed my mother, was it Muirfield?

Vinny B. Sexy: No. Not sexy enough. But you were kind of sexy. So I'll give you a clue about your current case.

Sexy Cat (really upset, not at all sexy): Are you F-ing serious?

{Sexy Cat throws Vinny B. Sexy off the roof.)

Well it didn't end like that, but that about sums up the childish line of question and answer the two love beast's play, and it goes... all... episode... l-o-n-g. It's apparent that Vinny B. Sexy is gonna make Sexy Cat work for some sexy-sexy answers and force us viewers to watch some terrible drama before we get answers. Those answers better be damn sexy!

As we are painfully pulled through this less than stellar second episode we are blessed with one gem for sacrificing an hour to CW's sexy altar. J"They call me the Sexy Bat Man"T Forbes proves that he ain't no bitch. When he hears someone breaking into the back of the warehouse, and remember this is a dude who has been in hiding from a killer super-secret-not-so-sexy-secret government agency for the last 7-9 years, instead of running he posts up with a bat, and when that door opens he swings for the fences. Luckily Cat's cat like reflexes kick in and she ducks the grand-slammer bammer. It appears that J"TCMTSBM"T Forbes is the only person Sexy Cat can successfully beat up.

Enter bike messenger assassin. Who uses the cleverest of ploys, pretending he was hit by your car, to sneak attack the victim/runner-overer. Luckily, oh so luckily, Vinny B. Sexy was creeper lurking, or perhaps just getting a meal from a dumpster in the same alley now that he's homeless. (Wait I did mention that he ran away from the warehouse right?) So he saves Sexy Cat right before she's about to be unsexily murdered. Beauty and the Beast failed the strong female lead test on this one. I vote they rename the show Saved by the Vinny and make it a whacky lady cop sitcom.

Seriously, this episode was disposable. At best they advanced the Vincent-Cat-Evan love triangle (but that's a blah-sosceles triangle), expanded our knowledge of Cat's family life (though with a rather annoying sister and not her conflicted father), and showed us that JT never runs, no matter how hot the kitchen gets, Ghost-GhostFacers!

That's 2 parts Bad to 1 part Good, so watch it (now-now) as that's a perfect mixture of unintended comedy.