*TRIGGER WARNING* This episode contains a few memories of depression. Nothing too heavy, but I want to let you know first.

This took me back to those early days after our eldest, Alfie, was born and having to go to the GP with depression. Yet my day-to-day memories are just of joy. Ah, the human parent mind.

Berihan Abbas Donald is a Mum-of-2. She is also a Solicitor, a netballer, a Muslim, and an Egyptian Hong Konger. She is also an expert in placating kids with Pom-bears.

In this episode we talk about fairness and how kids learn (or don't) how that works. Berihan's children are similar ages to my own 6-and-3-year-olds and that is just a daily joy at the moment.

We talk about the challenge of working as a professional when you have school holidays looming. Or even when it's normal school time. (3pm is practically midday anyway isn't it?)

Making time for each other as parents crops up. Or, rather, the sacrifice of that and the knowledge that you can do it in a few years' time...

Berihan asks if, as a Dad, I felt useless in those early days. That leads to a conversation about depression. Memories are scattered with all sorts aren't they?

Finally, what ARE the words to Hush Little Baby!?!?

You can follow Berihan on Twitter here - @BerihanAbbas

You can follow Dad Asks Mums on Twitter - @DadAsksMums

Or on Instagram - @DadAsksMums

If you're affected by the chat about depression, I found Mind were brilliant. Find them at Mind.org.uk

To be on the show, you can email me: [email protected]

I hope you're well. Take care and I'll see you soon.

Before this podcast I hadn't heard of The Mother Load. Now I am constantly wanting to ease it. Or feeling guilty because I'm probably not doing that. - Al

The Mother Load is something that keeps cropping up on this show. The constant needing to remember dates, events, non-uniform days, school trips. It's the thing that Becky wants to know about Dads in this episode: do we understand it?

(I type this the night before my son's class performance and have just remembered I got an email 3 weeks ago with the script on. Still, at least I know his performance is tomorrow...)

The question also arises of how Dads manage to escape to the bathroom for some time without being noticed. Or having the door banged down. What can I say? We're stealth-like...

Daddy's Disc of Dilemma: What's the etiquette around birthday parties? Alfie is 6 next week. How many do you invite at that age? All the class or just some close friends? It's a minefield of cake and party bags.

We talk about the songs that we sing our kids to sleep with. (Kenny Rogers gets a lot of love here. As he should everywhere.)

Plus, for the first time on the podcast (which is only 4 episodes in): Mum Confessions.

Becky Slater trained as a journalist, didn't like the serious stories, moved into doing PR for the Super Clubs of the late 90s/early 00s, and then set up her own PR business which meant she could look after charities and small businesses she cared about. Her business is called BeckAndCall PR. (Any title that comes from a name related pun has my full admiration.)

You can subscribe at DadAsksMums.com and leave a rating wherever you download or stream this. If you'd like. It feels weird asking for a review. That's not the point of a review, is it?

Becky can be found at Beck and Call PR.

Her Insta is here: BeckAndCallPR

And Becky Tweets @BeckandCallPR

If you'd like to be on the show, you can get in touch through the website or email me: [email protected]

Thanks for listening. I hope all is well and happy with you. Al

This chat got me thinking about the importance of my place as the first male role model in my daughter's life. And, for me, that means making sure she's aware of 90s pop anthems. - Al

This episode's guest is only The Mum of the whole-wide, world wide web, Sarah Simons. Right at the start you'll find out that this wasn't a title she gave herself, rather it was bestowed on her by the millions of fans of her son. But also, as you'll hear, it's quite deserved. Sarah is an ACE Mum.

Asking what was the last conversation she had with her son, Tom, Sarah talks about the helplessness of seeing your child grieve for the loss of a friend.

We touch upon internet safety, given that my 5-year-old is obsessed with watching donkey clips (with a recent added addition of anything Jurassic Park/World.)

As parents, your main job is to keep your kids safe. You know, in whatever context that means. So as an adult, would we go, "Go on seven year old go into that room and shut that door with lots of strangers talking about whatever you want, and you'll probably be fine"? No. - Sarah

The question Sarah, a Mum, wanted to ask me, a Dad, revolved around the importance of knowing I am the first male role model in my daughter's life. The responsibility of encouraging Sienna to grow as herself, and as a strong, independent, self-respecting woman.

Sarah talks about looking after her Dad and caring for him through his dementia.

Finally, you will hear the coolest parenting reason for taking your child out of school, ever. Baby, you were born to run!

Sarah Simons - The Internet Mum is available to enjoy in all her infectious positivity in this episode, and here:

Twitter - @MrsSarahSimons

Youtube - SarahSimonsInternetMum

If you can relate, or are affected by Sarah's story about caring for her Dad, here's a link to help you and your loved ones - Dementia UK

And Sarah calls her son Tom, but more than 14 million of his YouTube subscribers know him as @TommyInnit

Speaking of YouTube, here's one of my son's favourite donkey videos - HEE-HAW

Find Dad Asks Mums in other places on the internet. I'm going to start blogging and writing more about these chats soon. Just thought I'd share that. I know you're busy.

Twitter - @DadAsksMums

Insta - @DadAsksMums

I think I'm meant to ask you to leave a review and a rating wherever you listen to this, but that's incredibly presumptuous isn't it? If you do like it, or if you want to ask a question or, brilliantly, be a guest, you can email me: [email protected]

Thank you for listening. I hope you are well and happy.

Al

What is my love language? If it's what I think it is, then my love language is filled heavily with puns and dance moves that I think are like one of those colourful birds on nature programmes, but are actually probably quite annoying. - Al

Clio Wood is the first parent on Dad Asks Mums and gives me answers on things that matter, that I didn't even know I didn't know.

Clio is a successful author, having written the parent/sex guide "Get Your Mojo Back."

We talk about it in the show, although getting your mojo back does involve getting your 5-year-old to stay in their own bed.

And, the whole point of this podcast is to see the world from a Mum's perspective: turns out getting your mojo back is more likely to happen sooner for the Dad than the Mum. Who knew!?!

Clio also talks about peri-menopause which, being honest, I hadn't even heard of a year ago. (It's only because I was producing a client podcast centred around women's health that I heard of it then.)

As a Dad/Man, I think it's vital to know about these things. I wouldn't think to ask about what I didn't know. Now, I feel, I and other Dads/Men can have an understanding. I hope so. Clio does a very good job of explaining it all to this wide-eyed pupil.

We also cover love language. Again, I wasn't sure what this was. (Actually, I still think it's a modern term for romance and affection.)

You can find Clio Wood in all these places:

AndBreatheWellbeing.com

On The Instagram - AndBreatheWellbeing

And her published articles are here.

Of course, you can find Dad Asks Mums

On Twitter - @DadAsksMums

On Instagram - @DadAsksMums

And on YouTube - @DadAsksMums

"This conversation made me realise this podcast could be a place where Mum & Dad Guilt co-exists without judgement. And that I forgot to brush my daughter's teeth before bed." - Al

Lucy Baker is Geriatric Mum, although she isn't actually a geriatric; she's just in her 40s. Lucy is also a panellist on GMB, Radio 4's "Women's Hour", as well as being a confidence coach.

In this episode we talk about the taboo that still exists for women who become Mums after a certain age. More so, we talk about the fact it doesn't exist at all for men. (I was 40 and 43 when my children were born. At the time of writing actor Al Pacino is expecting another child and he's in his 80s!)

Lucy, who is a confidence coach, uses the "What would you, as a Mum, like to ask me, a Dad" question to discover whether Mum guilt exists in Dads.

It does. It really does. Daily. But isn't that just part of caring? And should we, can we just let it go?

Even though this podcast is called Dad Asks Mums, Lucy also asked me what I thought about Kerri as she went through labour. The reality of labour, if you will. (Spoiler: I thought she was amazing. How can you not be in awe of someone who has carried a human inside her for 9 months and then delivers it physically on her own?)

Lucy's eldest child lives with ADHD, so we talk a lot about that and the ways you have to re-invent the image of yourself as a parent. But then, that's true anyway isn't it? Because kids will have their own minds.

You can find out all about Lucy Baker AKA Geriatric Mum, here.

Or at her Twitter: @Geriatric_Mum

Maybe check out her Instagram: @Geriatric_Mum

Or if you want to benefit from Lucy's work as a confidence coach, visit She Coaches Confidence.

The theory is, as a Dad of 2 and fiance of 1, I record each episode and then go into the house and put all this advice I take from Mums into practice. As I say, that's the theory... - Al

Dad Asks Mums is a podcast where, rather than asking my partner every night what it's like to be a Mum - you know, when you're both shattered - I thought I'd start conversations and get advice from other Mums instead.

That way I can magically grow into this great partner and Dad with insider knowledge.

In each episode I'll be discussing the issues we all share as parents, and finding out about the ones I don't know about.

Questions such as:

What was the last conversation you had with your child?

What, as a Mum, do you think it's important for a Dad to ask you?

What, as a Mum, would you like to ask me, a Dad?

Each episode also features Daddy's Disc of Dilemma - a question which, by pure coincidence, matches up to the expertise of that episode's guest.

You can be on the show or suggest a dilemma you want the answer to by heading to these places.

Twitter - @DadAsksMums

Instagram - @DadAsksMums

Website - DadAsksMums.com

Or by email - [email protected]

Thank you for listening. If you have any suggestions, questions, or comments, I'd love to hear them.

Now, to put what I've learned from my first guests into practice...