My Daughters took over the podcast this week!

 

Interviewing Justin Whitmel Early about his new KIDS BOOK - "The Big Mess"

➡️ Why finding God in family life means embracing the mess, not avoiding it

➡️ How to create intentional spaces where your older kids will actually talk to you

➡️ The simple prayer that can transform frustrating parenting moments

➡️ Why throwing food might be good for your family (seriously!)

This episode is filled with giggles, wisdom, and practical advice for dads navigating the beautiful chaos of family life.

FULL SHOW NOTES: https://www.dadawesome.org/blog/382

SUMMARY:

The Zaugg girls take over the podcast! In this special episode, Justin Whitmel Earley joins the four sisters to discuss his delightful new children's book, "The Big Mess." Discover why creating giant desserts (and sometimes destroying them) can teach profound lessons about forgiveness, sibling relationships, and finding God in the beautiful chaos of family life. Plus, hear why the girls are planning their own rooftop cookie adventure and how throwing pancakes across the kitchen can become a cherished family tradition.

TAKEAWAYS

• The best relationship-building moments with your children happen in the mess, not by avoiding or controlling it.
• As kids grow older, shift from structured rhythms to creating intentional spaces where deeper conversations can happen naturally.
• Relationship is built in shared activity—invite your children into your projects, even when it means things will take longer or be done imperfectly.
• A "pause prayer" before disciplining your children can transform how you respond to frustrating situations.
• The reconciliation between siblings can be generative, creating joy that extends beyond your family to bless your entire neighborhood.

GUEST

Justin Whitmel Earley is the bestselling author of "The Common Rule," "Habits of the Household," and "Mate." He's also the founder of The Hang Ten Movement, which encourages parents to wait until 10th grade before giving their children smartphones. Justin lives with his wife and four sons near Richmond, Virginia, where they enjoy building (and sometimes smashing) enormous desserts in their kitchen and driveway.

 

Links mentioned:

• Send a Voice Message to DadAwesome: 
• Apply to join the next DadAwesome Accelerator Cohort: Email [email protected]
• Subscribe to DadAwesome Messages: Text the word "Dad" to (651) 370-8618
• The Big Mess by Justin Whitmel Earley
• The Common Rule by Justin Whitmel Earley
• Habits of the Household by Justin Whitmel Earley
• Made For People by Justin Whitmel Earley
• The Hang Ten Movement

SUMMARY

Fatherhood isn't about perfection—it's about presence, moral consistency, and showing up when it matters most. In this heart-stirring episode from the vault, Bob Merritt shares powerful stories about those precious moments that define a father's legacy. From confronting hard truths with his college-aged son to the tear-filled goodbye when his daughter left for college, Bob reveals how staying faithful in the small things prepares you for the big moments that matter most.

TAKEAWAYS

• Consistency in three areas—staying married, staying moral, and pursuing God—creates a foundation that enables deeper father-child connections.
• Only strong fathers have the courage to ask their children where they need to improve; weak men avoid this vulnerability.
• When your child makes concerning choices, choose thoughtful engagement over passive silence—staying in the battle is more important than saying everything perfectly.
• The most meaningful moments in fatherhood are earned through years of faithful presence and moral consistency.
• Choose laughter and joy in your home—a house that hasn't heard genuine laughter in months reveals deeper issues.

GUEST

Bob Merritt served as Senior Pastor of Eagle Brook Church for over two decades before transitioning to leadership teaching, consulting, and coaching. He is a father of two, grandfather of six, and author of several books on leadership and faith. Bob is known for his practical, down-to-earth teaching style and his passionate commitment to helping people grow in their faith and leadership.

 

Links mentioned:

• Send a Voice Message to DadAwesome https://www.speakpipe.com/DadAwesome
• Apply to join the next DadAwesome Accelerator Cohort: Email [email protected]
• Subscribe to DadAwesome Messages: Text the word "Dad" to (651) 370-8618
• Bob Merritt's website and resources https://www.bobmerritt.com/
• Eagle Brook Church

FROM THE VAULT:

• Initially released in August of 2021
• 🏠 "Home was not just a place I lived, but the place I most wanted to be."
• ✅ The blind spots that almost derailed his family (and how he overcame them)
• ✅ Why church attendance matters more than you think
• ✅ How to create a home your kids actually want to be in
• ✅ The power of courageous humility in fatherhood

SUMMARY

What if the most powerful thing you could do as a dad wasn't extraordinary at all? In this heart-stirring conversation, Pastor Bob Merritt reveals how 30+ years of simple daily faithfulness transformed his family's life. From humble beginnings to leading one of Minnesota's largest churches, Bob shares the painful intervention that saved his career, marriage, and fatherhood legacy. Plus, you'll hear his daughter's emotional tribute that will make you rethink what true success as a dad looks like.

TAKEAWAYS

• Your daily faithfulness matters more than you realize—even when parenting feels monotonous and difficult
• Leading your family to church consistently is one of the most foundational ways to impact your children's faith
• Confronting your blind spots requires tremendous courage but can completely transform your family legacy
• The words you speak and the example you set as a dad influence your children for decades to come
• Creating a home your children want to be in starts with staying faithful to your spouse

GUEST

Bob Merritt served as Senior Pastor of Eagle Brook Church in Minnesota for nearly three decades, helping it grow to become one of the largest churches in America. He's the author of several books including "Done With That" and "Get Wise." Now retired from full-time ministry, Bob enjoys spending time with his wife Laurie, their two adult children, and six grandchildren. His greatest joy is seeing his family's continued commitment to faith and watching the legacy of intentional parenting extend to the next generation.

5 Most Impactful Quotes

• "It really is in the small, little daily things that really matter... I think parenting is the hardest thing on the planet... But I would go back and say it's your daily faithfulness, even though you don't know what you're doing half the time. But it's your daily faithfulness to your marriage, to showing up at home after work, to put the kids in your lap and just day after day after day after day of monotony in many cases. But out of that, God has a ripple effect and will do things and impact people now in ways that you'd never dreamed possible."
• "You don't have to know how to pray. You don't even have to read the Bible that much. You don't have to know how to memorize scripture or do devotions. But you can lead your kids to church and see what God will do because they're watching you."
• "Will I have enough humility, will I have enough strength to ask somebody, 'Hey, will you help me see some things in my life?' It's a person of strength who is willing to admit 'I've got an anger problem.' People of weakness will never admit they have an issue."
• "Every human being, because we are sinful, we are all flawed. We all have blindspots. Every dad should give themselves the gift of going to a professional counselor and say, 'Hey, where am I good and where am I weak? Would you help me see my weak spots?' For many men, that would be the key transformational moment in their life."
• "You are the most important influence as a dad in your home... your kids are watching you at all times. For good or bad, how you live your life as a dad will impact your kids for the rest of their life."

Links mentioned:

• Send a Voice Message to DadAwesome
• Apply to join the next DadAwesome Accelerator Cohort: Email [email protected]
• Subscribe to DadAwesome Messages: Text the word "Dad" to (651) 370-8618
• Bob Merritt Website: https://www.bobmerritt.com/

David Mills believes the mess and chaos of life make the best stories. In this episode, he shares how to infuse more fun and adventure into your parenting journey. You’ll hear real talk about dad guilt, finding your tribe, and why doing life with other men makes all the difference. 

 

TAKEAWAYS

•  An adventure mindset shifts how you view your circumstances so that even the challenging moments become stories worth telling.
• Doing hard things awakens the warrior in you.
• Every parent struggles with parent guilt, so give yourself grace. 
• Do you have 12 men in your town you could call at 2 a.m. who’d show up, no questions asked? If not, it’s time to build your tribe.

 

GUEST

Dave “Goose” Mills is the Founder and Director of Men’s Alliance. Spending his career in the Air Force flying squadrons taught him how tribes are formed, how they operate, and how they save lives. He started Men's Alliance to surround himself with strong Christian warriors in order to keep his life on course. Goose has been married for 24 years and has four kids.

 

QUOTES

• "I believe we were literally designed for hard times... It's not just that it makes us better men, which it does, but it also awakens in us, you know, the heart that God designed us to have. We were born to do hard things." - David Mills [00:09:37]
• "You would be an absolute fool to try to do this by yourself. Like, don't try to go this alone. The myth of the lone ranger has been prevalent in our culture. The truth of the matter is everything important and big that's ever been done was done by a group." - David Mills [00:30:01]

 

LINKS

• Send a Voice Message to DadAwesome

• Apply to join the next DadAwesome Accelerator Cohort: Email [email protected] 

• Subscribe to DadAwesome Messages: Text the word “Dad” to (651) 370-8618

• Men's Alliance

 

In this episode, Brian Doyle shares what it was like to parent through the unimaginable. After losing his wife to cancer at age 54, Brian had to navigate his own grief while guiding his teenage and young adult kids through theirs. His story will challenge you to keep your eyes on the future, disciple your kids with purpose, and take initiative to invest in the dads around you.

 

TAKEAWAYS:

• Instead of avoiding grief, learn to walk through it in a healthy way so your sorrow can eventually lead to joy.

• If you want your kids to follow Christ, you have to show them what that looks like in your everyday life.

• You’re not raising kids; you’re launching disciples.

• No one else can do what God designed you as a man to do.

• The time you invest in younger dads today can equip them for the challenges they’ll face decades from now.

 

GUEST

Brian Doyle is the Founder and President of Iron Sharpens Iron and serves as the National Director of the ISI Ministry Network. The mission of Iron Sharpens Iron is to equip churches to train men for spiritual leadership in the home, church and community. 

#DadAwesome #christiandad #dadlife #parenting #dadpodcast #fatherhood  

Links mentioned: 

• Send a Voice Message to DadAwesome

• Apply to join the next DadAwesome Accelerator Cohort: Email [email protected]  

• Subscribe to DadAwesome Messages: Text the word “Dad” to (651) 370-8618

• Iron Sharpens Iron

 

Joy isn’t just about feeling good. It's your secret weapon for raising resilient kids and showing up as a healthy, loving dad. In this episode, Chris Coursey unpacks the brain science behind joy and shares practical strategies you can use to stay calm and connected, whether it’s your own emotions flaring or your child’s.

 

Key takeaways:

 

• Joy is built through connection, while happiness depends on your circumstances.

• God wired your brain for emotions, so it’s important to know what helps you return to your relational, peaceful self. 

• Validation and comfort sets the stage for effective correction.

• Building joy helps you and your kids navigate life’s challenges with more resilience.

 

Guest bio:

 

Chris Coursey is the President of THRIVEtoday. For nearly 25 years he has been developing and practicing brain-based solutions to make relationships work. Chris is a published author with ten books in print, husband to Jen, and father to Matthew and Andrew. 

 

 

Links mentioned: 

 

• Send a Voice Message to DadAwesome

• Apply to join the next DadAwesome Accelerator Cohort: Email [email protected]  

• Subscribe to DadAwesome Messages: Text the word “Dad” to (651) 370-8618

• THRIVEtoday

• Emotions Wheel

• The Joy Switch 

• The 4 Habits Series

• All Books and Resources

 

There is never a dull moment as a parent, especially in a world dominated by screens and technology. In this episode, Dave Willis shares how he’s tackling tough conversations with his sons about sex, boundaries, and the dangers of pornography. Plus, he explains how the words you speak as a dad can become your child’s inner voice—for better or for worse. 

 

Key Takeaways:

• The best moments come from undistracted one-on-one interactions where you connect with your kids in their world each day.
• A child’s mind and heart are like wet cement, and the words you say leave lasting impressions.
• It’s important to create a safe, shame-free space to talk about sex and God’s design for the body with your kids.
• Be prepared to guide your kids through a complex digital world filled with AI, robots, and other predatory technology.
• God designed your marriage to flourish. 

 

GUEST:

Dave Willis and his wife, Ashley, are the authors of multiple books including the bestseller, The Naked Marriage. They’re also Christian speakers, marriage coaches, and the hosts of The Marriage on the Line Podcasts. They have four sons and live near Augusta, Georgia.

 

Key Quotes:

• "Being present in these moments in like every single day looking for the undistracted one-on-one conversation with each kid, trying to connect with them in their world each day. It doesn't have to be big or fancy or structured, but being intentional about that, those tend to be my best moments of the day." [00:05:41]
• "We cannot overestimate the power of our words. And God designed it that way. He created the whole universe using His words... the words we're speaking to our kids, they're gonna become the soundtrack, the inner voice in those kids' heads as they grow. I mean, they're gonna hear our voices for the rest of their lives." [00:01:12]
• "When our kids, what they see in us, they think is healthy and they think it's normal, even if it's totally broken." [00:05:59]
• "Your teaching authority, moral authority, doesn't come from a place of perfection... but they desperately needed to come from a placed of honesty and authenticity to say like, listen, this is where I blew it." [00:25:43]
• "Let's be dads who pass along generational blessing instead of baggage to our kids." (This is from his closing prayer) [00:39:05]

 

Links mentioned: 

 

• Send a Voice Message to DadAwesome

• Apply to join the next DadAwesome Accelerator Cohort: Email [email protected]  

• Subscribe to DadAwesome Messages: Text the word “Dad” to (651) 370-8618

• The Naked Marriage by Dave & Ashley Willis

• Raising Boys Who Respect Girls by Dave Willis

• The Marriage on the Line Podcast

• “When I Tell You that I Love You” Poem 

• 9 Days to Great Sex Free eBook

 

When you set aside your programmed pragmatism and rediscover wonder, life with Jesus takes on a whole new depth. In this episode, John Eldredge shares how technology and the internet constantly fight for your attention and how you can push back by embracing ordinary, mystical moments to connect with God. You’ll also hear why prayer, lingering, and turning your heart toward God are essential for your Christian walk. 

  Key Takeaway

 

• The hyper-rational, left-brain approach to life isn’t good for your soul. You were designed to experience beauty, wonder, and connection with God. 
• There’s a battle for your attention and affection, and the world is constantly trying to pull your union with God apart.
• Turning your heart toward God often comes before intellectual understanding.
• Learning to linger in God’s presence is essential for healing, connection, and repairing your soul in a world programmed for distraction.

  John Eldredge

 

John Eldredge is an author, counselor, teacher, and the president of Wild at Heart. He and his wife, Stasi, have three sons and are proud grandparents. John loves all things beauty, nature, adventure, and more. 

 

Key Quotes

 

• 10:35 - " Psalm 91, he who dwells in the shelter of the most high will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. And I think that idea of rest, let your anxiety come down, let the cortisol come down, let the fight or flightcome down a little bit. I think this is a brilliant gospel moment to be able to show people, you know what, you can actually be safe in the love of God, you can actually feel safe in His care and in His protection. If we can get people, back to your thing, if we can get the wonder back. If you can get the cynical adult pragmatism to just put the gun down for a minute and just go, you know what, you can actually take refuge in the presence of God. You will find it to be that lovely fort experience of, I feel good."
• 38:54 - "You sit with another human being and look eye to eye and listen to one another, it literally heals the human brain. It is a healing experience to your physiology to listen with compassion and to be listened to with compassion. That's just basic human connection."

  Links from Today’s Conversation

 

• Send a Voice Message to DadAwesome
• Apply to join the next DadAwesome Accelerator Cohort: Email [email protected]  
• Subscribe to DadAwesome Messages: Text the word “Dad” to (651) 370-8618
• Experience Jesus. Really. by John Eldredge
• Audible: Experience Jesus. Really. 
• Wild at Heart Events
• 30 Days to Resilient in the One Minute Pause App

Connect with dadAWESOME

 

• Make a Donation to dadAWESOME
• Join the dadAWESOME Prayer Team
• Receive weekly encouragement by texting "dad" to 651-370-8618

Your daughter’s transformation into a young woman is designed by God. But as a dad, stepping back to protect her can be tough when all you want is to reconnect like you did when she was younger. In this episode, Jay Heck, Rob Porter, and Jeff Zaugg unpack the powerful "Chrysalis Analogy" and reveal how God uses this transition to draw you closer to Him while strengthening your relationship with your kids.

  Key Takeaway

 

• Being a supportive protector instead of forcing connection as your daughter ages will build intimacy and make both of your lives easier. 
• Your daughter’s view of men will be shaped by how safe and loved she feels with you as her father.
• Just like a butterfly emerging from a chrysalis, your daughter’s spiritual, physical, and hormonal transformation requires you to stand back and trust God’s design.
• Your thoughts and words hold immense power. Choose to speak vision and blessings over your daughter’s life.

  Jay Heck & Rob Porter

 

Jay Heck is the founder and director of Being Songs, a ministry helping men discover that authentic, fearless, God-designed manhood begins by being a son. He and his wife, Heather, have two young adult children. 

Rob Porter lives in New Zealand with his wife and two kids. He leads Let’s Keep Rising, a ministry that crafts adventures, events, and resources that meet men where they are and help them experience restoration in the most critical relationships they have, beginning with God

 

Key Quotes

 

• 21:15 - "I recall you mentioning, Jay, I get to become more of a son through my daughter. So the thing that sticks out to me is, what are the messages my daughter is receiving from me? Jay, I think you laid out this idea of air, food and water. Attention being the air, affection being the food, and affirmation being the water. And what I'm really feeling, where I'm maturing, is my awareness in a given situation. So, that when I'm feeling stressed or frustrated or whatever my emotions are stirring, that I'm able to separate that from coming out to my child. That I'm able to be aware of what's the message that they're receiving from me."
• 24:51 - "One of the things that I was guilty of, and this was my heart's response or reaction to fear, that I don't know what I'm doing. So, when I can't make sense of it, I like to put a label on it. My daughter is difficult, or she's hard-headed. I mean, people joke about this stuff all the time, but when you really begin to think about it, you are speaking and you are affirming a reality. You're speaking something into existence. Like if I, in my anger, I can say, my daughter's being so difficult today. And the next day I say the same thing. And then after three days, I'm like, my daughter is difficult. Like it grows, the story begins to be more comprehensive. I don't know what to do with my daughter. Wow, is that really the story or is it you just don't know what to do in this instant with her? You don't know how to love her. And so we can just say these curses all the time."

 

Links from Today’s Conversation

 

• Send a Voice Message to DadAwesome
• Apply to join the next DadAwesome Accelerator Cohort: Email [email protected]  
• Subscribe to DadAwesome Messages: Text the word “Dad” to (651) 370-8618
• Let’s Keep Rising
• Being Sons Events
• Raising Boys and Girls
• 31: A Dad’s Guide to "The Stages of The Feminine Journey" w/Stasi Eldredge | Being Sons Podcast
• Sissy Goff Books

Connect with dadAWESOME

 

• Make a Donation to dadAWESOME
• Join the dadAWESOME Prayer Team
• Receive weekly encouragement by texting "dad" to 651-370-8618

Jeff Zaugg and Rob Porter sit down with Jay Heck for a powerful, three-way conversation on fatherhood. In Part 1, they dive into the tension between being a provider and still embracing curiosity, adventure, and childlike wonder. They also unpack the unique triune relationship between a father, God, and his child.

  Key Takeaway

 

• Are you approaching life like an orphan or like a son whose father is going to come through for him even if he makes a mistake? 
• Slowing down can help you navigate the tension between being a provider and embracing curiosity, wonder, and creativity. 
• God uses your trials to bring wholeness, restoration, and healing. 
• You don’t have to exhaust yourself to allow God to do a work in you.
• Instead of carrying the burden of fatherhood alone, realize that you are ultimately raising God’s child, and He will be there to help you.

  Jay Heck & Rob Porter

 

Jay Heck is the founder and director of Being Songs, a ministry helping men discover that authentic, fearless, God-designed manhood begins by being a son. He and his wife, Heather, have two young adult children. 

Rob Porter lives in New Zealand with his wife and two kids. He leads Let’s Keep Rising, a ministry that crafts adventures, events, and resources that meet men where they are and help them experience restoration in the most critical relationships they have, beginning with God

 

Key Quotes

 

• 14:49- "I want to learn from it. I want to patch things up where there's been a rupture and let's keep going. And that has produced so much fruit. Growing up as a kid, I came out of childhood with a fear of a lack of connection, a lack of attachment with my children. So I think out of the pain and out of the crucible of our past, we have the opportunity to have a glorious future if we dig into God and say, help redeem what my experience was."
• 47:35 - "What if, in fact, we begin operating under the paradigm that God is the Father, which means that all provision actually comes from Him. All protection actually comes from Him. The plan for my child's life that I feel like is so on me to help them navigate, what if God, like it says in Scripture, already has all the days numbered for them before one of them came to be? What if He already knows their nature, their goodness? What if He already knows what He's been training them for, what they're learning in the present moment, and He already knows, I've got all this stuff that I need to them and father them through for them to become what I created. What that means is that I can get in the way. If I take that posture that I'm the dad, I can so much be the wall and the obstacle between God and my child. If I can, if we can begin looking at it where God is the Father will, and then we've got this interchangeable relationship, I can be His child and God's going to use my son or my daughter to help me lean on Him."

 

Links from Today’s Conversation

 

• Send a Voice Message to DadAwesome
• Apply to join the next DadAwesome Accelerator Cohort: Email [email protected]  
• Subscribe to DadAwesome Messages: Text the word “Dad” to (651) 370-8618
• Let’s Keep Rising
• Being Sons Events

Connect with dadAWESOME

 

• Make a Donation to dadAWESOME
• Join the dadAWESOME Prayer Team
• Receive weekly encouragement by texting "dad" to 651-370-8618