Stop patting yourself on the back for that 2% Click-Through Rate. It’s embarrassing. In this episode, Zero-Click Nick tries to impress Hallucination Heidi with his monthly SEO report, only to realize he’s reporting on a ghost town. We expose the "Agency Lie"—why the reports you pay thousands for are hiding the real disaster inside the AI "Black Box." We cover:

• Why your Google Search Console is gaslighting you.
• The difference between "Ranking" (useless) and "Being the Answer" (profitable).
• Geometrika Deep Dive: We break down the only metrics that matter in 2025: Visibility Rate, Keyword Coverage, and the all-mighty GEO Score.
• How to fire your agency if they can't tell you your Share of Voice in ChatGPT.

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