Dating and The Big D

axwell Anders, Charlie Gold, and Sommer Bailey discuss their dating experiences in Dallas-The Big D and welcome their first guest on the show, Ben the Soldier.

Catching up on the last week's dating encounters...

Sommer went on three tinder dates. One guy ordered nothing and just sat there the whole time! What does it say if he/she does not order anything? Another guy complained about this job and life the whole time. We all have a negative side but there is something to be said about bringing your best foot forward on the first date. Was he just looking for free therapy? The third guy was the best date of the three. They had a romantic dinner at Bolsa in the Bishop Arts District. However, he is planning on moving in a month! He had such game that he invited her. Will she go?

Max is continuing his journey of self-love and self-exploration. He joined a Facebook group called "Gay Man Thriving" which is a company that works with gay men tired of being alone. He joined their 5 Day Challenge which focused on empowerment and daily affirmations. Think of it as a vision board for love, dating, and self hotness. Max and his buddy Daniel went to Stereo Live in Dallas to danced the night away to the rhythms of DJ Ummet Ozcan where they talked to a few cute guys and had a great time!

Charlie and went on a date at Toasted in Dallas next to Milk Cream on Lower Greenville Ave.

This week's topic of discussion is Dallas and dating in an urban center. Dallas – Dating in an Urban Center. How do you feel about the dating scene in Dallas? Where do you go out to meet other singles in Dallas? Does Dallas or other cities have their own singles and dating scene style? 

Max, Charlie, and Sommer love brunch and coffee at Meddlesome Moth and Ascension in the Design District. We have had great friend dates in Bishop Arts for events such as Bastille Day and Christmas in July. Other great locations in Dallas are Mockingbird Station, Shops at Park Lane, Bishops Arts, Uptown, West Village, Lower Greenville Ave, Lakewood, Design District, The Katy Trail, and White Rock Lake.

Dating Challenge: There are so many venues and opportunities to meet people In Dallas or in any city for that matter. Last week, we focused on getting out of our comfort zone and go up and talking to someone we normally wouldn’t consider for ourselves or them. This week’s dating challenge is to explore and try new locales or scenes that we are not familiar with. We are single so maybe trying something new might be a breath of fresh air. 

Max, Charlie, and Sommer then go into their dating experiences in the city and what they hope to get from their show and sharing their love lives.

Guest: Ben the Soldier was our first guest on the show! He shared what makes him an international dating D....errr guru. He filled us in on an embarrassing dating encounter with a tatted girl at Houlihan's in Addison, Texas, and how he bowed out gracefully when he wasn't feeling the connection. How do you handle a date that isn't going anywhere? 

Dating Quiz: The dating quiz this week is This Dating Test Will Reveal What People Find Most Attractive About You from Buzzfeed Inc. Check out the quiz yourself and let us know how you did.

Dating Book/Article Review: Sommer introduces the article of the week

Max, Charlie, and Sommer got together at Ascension Coffee in Dallas' Design District before recording their first episode of Dating and The Big D. After a great brunch, the team went to thedallasgeek Studios in Dallas, Texas to record.

Maxwell Anders, Charlie Gold, and S0mmer Bailey give a brief introduction of themselves and where they are in the dating lives.

The gang discusses the episode topic - Standards. Are your standards too high or not high enough? Do you value yourself enough or do you see yourself out of the league of those you are attracted to? 

Dating Challenge: This episode's dating challenge is to consider getting out of your comfort zone and introducing yourself to a guy or girl you may not have considered before for someone you thought you were out of their league. 

Dating Quiz: Max, Charlie, and Sommer then go into their dating experiences in the city and what they hope to get from their show and sharing their love lives.

The dating quiz this week is

The Dating Quiz to See If Your Standards Are Too High from thequiz.com. Check out the quiz yourself at www.thequiz.com/dating-quiz-to-see-if-your-standards-are-too-high/ 

Book/Article Review: Max shares a great book he just finished called Wired for Dating by Stan Tatkin PsyD MFT. The book delves into the psychobiology of dating. He discusses how the book talks about "Sherlocking," and the different types of attachment styles that lead to different ways of dealing with relationships. Are you an anchor, an island, or a wave?

Call to action: Do we place standards on ourselves and other romantic interests because we are afraid to consider other options in our lives? 

Episode Quote:  "Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations" – Vulcan Proverb 

Take the time to see men or women as a greater part of who we are and how our lives could be enriched by them.   The choice is yours.

Music featured on this episode:  

Paint the Sky by Hans Atom (c) copyright 2015 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license. http://dig.ccmixter.org/files/hansatom/50718 Ft: Miss Judged

Urbana-Metronica (wooh-yeah mix) by spinningmerkaba (c) copyright 2011 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license. http://dig.ccmixter.org/files/jlbrock44/33345 Ft: Morusque, Jeris, CSoul, Alex Beroza

This way >> by Scomber (c) copyright 2014 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license. http://dig.ccmixter.org/files/scomber/45961 Ft: Donnie Ozone

Maxwell Anders explores and shares on the ups and downs of dating, sex, relationships, and all things related to the Big D.

On Episode 41 - Dawn, Max explores new beginnings in dating. We often fear the end or a turning point in our life, especially when it comes to our romantic partnerships. Full of fear, anxiety, and trepidation we ponder the next step we must take when starting over.

Maxwell was on a break from dating to work on himself and is starting to talk to guys again on the dating apps. 

Dallas celebrity South Dallas Foodie is our special guest on this episode and shares about her dating life and new beginning. Later she fills us in about the great and exciting things to do in Dallas for Spring and Summer.   We review the article " How to start dating again after a break" by Anna Lovine at mashable.com, go over our takeaway, episode quote and give a shoutout to Black Swan Yoga in Dallas.

Great Dallas date spots: 
Klyde Warren Park
Dallas Arboretum
Perot Museum
Nasher Sculpture Center
Late Nights at the Dallas Museum of Art
Hawkers Asian Street Food
Cafe Madrid

"It's our right to say what our time is...only I can know." -South Dallas Foodie

"Coming from a place of yes.." -South Dallas Foodie

"No matter where I go there I am, and that's the best part of it because I am whole person. I dont need anything else. I already have everything that I need." - Maxwell Anders

"I like to say that we shine, and when you are confident in yourself you shine more." - Maxwell Anders

Music featured on this episode:

Track: Cotton Candy — Another Kid [Audio Library Release]
Music provided by Audio Library Plus
Watch: https://youtu.be/JUYS60ZzC4s
Free Download / Stream: https://alplus.io/cotton-candy

Secrets by RYYZN https://soundcloud.com/ryyzn
Creative Commons — Attribution 3.0 Unported — CC BY 3.0
Free Download / Stream: https://bit.ly/-secrets
Music promoted by Audio Library https://youtu.be/Q2-WKpaHsdM

Leonell Cassio - Stuck In A Dream (ft. Juhi Perumal) [Royalty Free/Free To Use]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jr1UPMzjBT0

Maxwell Anders explores and shares on the ups and downs of dating, sex, relationships, and all things related to the Big D.

On Episode 40 - Depression, Maxwell, Brooklyn, and Asia discuss the impact depression can have on our dating lives.  At times life can hit is like a sledgehammer. With hustle and bustle of life, we have the demands of work, family, friends, society, dating and love.  It comes to a halt and our mental health can take a hit.  What are the signs of depression, and do we need to just take a break even when it comes to our love lives? 

Max does not hear back from Nick after dating for two months and appears to have been ghosted and needs to rethink the whole hookup strategy.  He shares on his recent experience with depression.  Brooklyn and his partner have been making a point to spend time together at home.

Therapist Randy Woodring from Dallas is our professional in the studio.  We review the articles "Dating With Depression: Expert Tips to Help You Succeed" from Psychcom.net.  We go over the Episode Quote and Shout Out.

"I got told I was a top.  A blouse is a feminine top" - Brooklyn Steele

Music featured on this episode:

Anybody — Next Route [Audio Library Release]
Music provided by Audio Library Plus
Watch: https://youtu.be/A7yTHfK58rg
Free Download / Stream: https://alplus.io/anybody

Leonell Cassio - Out Of Time (ft. Lily Hain)

Savfk Music - Ultra
https://savfk.github.io/savfk/ultra/
https://www.youtube.com/savfkmusic

Maxwell Anders explores and shares on the ups and downs of dating, sex, relationships, and all things related to the Big D.

On Episode 39 - Deviance Redux, Maxwell, Brooklyn, and Asia discuss the multifaceted nature of kink and BDSM and the importance of consent.  There is so much under the sun and in the closet that attracts us and turns us on. Kink and BDSM can be just as much about comfort and discovery, and it is about deviance and exploration. What parts do consent and honest play when it comes to BDSM and is vanilla hot as kink?

The gang starts off with a heated discussion about bisexuality.  Since being last on the show Asia swore off women and now has a new girlfriend. Brooklyn opens up about how he and his fiancé continue therapy as maintenance and support their open relationship. Max shows off a new pair of arse-less chaps he hasn't had the chance to use yet!  The gang opens up about who they would have sex with from a sexual identity they are not normally attracted to.

Hope from Dallas is our special guest on this episode and shares her insight and experience with the BDSM community and kink life.

*This episode was originally recorded September 2021

"If you can't say no, then it's not consent." - Hope

"We have to value ourselves enough to where we can get to a place to communicate our needs, our wants and our boundaries and be okay with the other person stepping out if that's what they choose to do."   -Hope

Episode Quote: "Sex is a team sport sugar." - Cherise Sinclair from "Breaking Free"

For more information on BDSM, Kink, and Consent:

The Consent Academy

Beyond Vanilla

South Plains Leatherfest

Crow Academy

Master/slave Conference

Music featured on this episode:

Too Sweet — IVAAVI [Audio Library Release]
Music provided by Audio Library Plus
Watch: youtu.be/wfKbVnW4Gco
Free Download / Stream: alplus.io/too-sweet

Ryyzn-Descriptions
COPYRIGHT FREE
Free Download: bit.ly/3Ais6fc
Stream: ffm.to/ryyzn-descriptions
Lyrics: genius.com/Ryyzn-descriptions-lyrics
Produced By: RYYZN, @aymen

Savfk-Song of the Wanderers
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9yU4MRhp3g

Maxwell Anders explores and shares on the ups and downs of dating, sex, relationships, and all things related to the Big D.

On Episode 38 - Devastation, Maxwell and Brooklyn delve into the the destruction and that is caused my rape and assault.  Few acts of violence can parallel the utter destruction that is committed on a person when rape and stalking are committed.  How do we protect ourselves, heal and have a sense of agency when such acts are committed upon us. 

Max and Brooklyn return after an extended hiatus.  Our beloved Beau has parted ways.  Brooklyn decides it's time to make a change with this current job and hopefully can make time for him and his loving partner.  Maxwell shares about his relapse and the assault that led to the relapse.  Maxwell continues by sharing his history with sexual assault and stalking on an intimate Dating and the Big D. 

We answer a listener's e-mail asking how to open her marriage and we review the article “I Matched With the Perfect Date on Tinder – Then He Started Stalking Me" from www.vice.com.  We go over our Episode Takeaway, Episode Quote, and we give a shout-out to Blue Seat Studios of the YouTube video, "Consent, It's Simple As Tea."

*This episode was originally recorded September 2021


Music featured on this episode:

Track: Bliss Of Heaven — SOMM [Audio Library Release]
Music provided by Audio Library Plus
Watch: https://youtu.be/JQ6mKeQLZak
Free Download / Stream: https://alplus.io/blisss-heaven

The Clock (instrumental) by RYYZN https://soundcloud.com/ryyzn
Creative Commons — Attribution 3.0 Unported — CC BY 3.0
Free Download / Stream: https://bit.ly/al-the-clock
Music promoted by Audio Library https://youtu.be/Sf-DjaE_TeE

Maxwell Anders and Brooklyn Steele explore and share on the ups and downs of dating, sex, relationships, and all things related to the Big D.

On Episode 37 - stackeD, Max, and Brooklyn discuss the role that health, fitness, and the pressures of body image affect their love and sex lives.  Health, fitness, body sculpting, shaping – we get so many messages from society to fit into a certain mold to be attractive and desirable.  Is there a perfect balance between looks and health?  Can we go too far trying to achieve that perfect body to find a mate?  What messages do we receive from society and culture regarding our bodies and attractiveness?

Max starts dating a sexy geek only to have it end a month later. What does Maxwell learn from the experience? Brooklyn and his fiance make time for what's important: supporting each other and a date night during their increasingly busy schedules.

Hunter Nelson from Dallas is our fitness trainer and dating guru in the studio.  We answer a listener's e-mail asking how to open her marriage and we review the article “15 Tips for Dating A Body Builder" from muscleandfitness.com.  We go over our Episode Takeaway, Episode Quote, and we give a shout-out to our beloved and departed angel, Buddy the beagle.

Music featured on this episode:

Caballero - Ofshane
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC34Wh4ysdP50H-ThbZFFfsA

RYYZN - Deja Vu [Copyright Free]

Reloaded (FREE DOWNLOAD) By Savfk - Music
This music is licensed under a ‘Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License (CC BY 4.0)’. You can find the link to that license here: creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Maxwell Anders, Beau Alexander, and Brooklyn Steele explore and share on the ups and downs of dating, sex, relationships, and all things related to the Big D.

On Episode 36 - Decisive, Max and Beau reflect on taking decisive actions to take ownership of the direction of their love lives.  Dating can be a whirlwind and some of us just feel like it’s never-ending white water in the rapids which never seem to never to calm down.  Others feel that it’ll never happen and that if we only had the right set of circumstances our love life would be great.  What happens when we decide to take bold action and are decisive in the direction our lives will take?

Beau takes time for self-care and self-love as he is making big strides in his life. Max has a romantic encounter with another guy in recovery but finds that there are gaps that time will not be able to fill.  Brooklyn is on vacation and will be back for the next episode. 

Enrique from Dallas is our dating guru in the studio.  We answer a listener's e-mail asking when is it okay to introduce sex of the rear end variety, and we review the book “Dating Sucks, but You Don't: The Modern Guy's Guide to Total Confidence, Romantic Connection, and Finding the Perfect Partner" By Connell Barrett.  We go over our Episode Takeaway, Episode Quote, and we give a shout-out to Ana of Ana Psychology YouTube Channel.

Music featured on this episode:

Song: Diamond Eyes - Flutter [NCS Release]
Music provided by NoCopyrightSounds
Free Download/Stream: http://ncs.io/Flutter
Watch: http://youtu.be/lEHM9HZf0IA

Can't Find 'Em - RYYZN
Youtube: www.youtube.com/watch?v=eBKptSRIhUI
Spotify: spoti.fi/2mdPyKb
Lyrics: genius.com/Ryyzn-cant-find-em-lyrics
Follow RYYZN 🤙
Soundcloud: @ryyzn
Facebook: www.facebook.com/RYYZN/
Instagram: www.instagram.com/weareryyzn/
Twitter: twitter.com/weareryyzn
RYYZN Patreon:
www.patreon.com/RYYZN


The Messenger - feat Nikos Spiliotis - Savfkhttps://www.youtube.com/savfkmusic
You can download and use this track for free but PLEASE SUBSCRIBE TO MY YOUTUBE CHANNEL IF YOU USE MY MUSIC: www.youtube.com/savfkmusic
Follow Nikos Spiliotis here:
Youtube: www.youtube.com/user/nikospiliotis
Website: spiliotismusic.wixsite.com/theartofmelody
Facebook: www.facebook.com/nikospiliotis
Bandcamp: nspiliotismusic.bandcamp.com
Soundcloud: @nspiliotis
If you wish to donate (thank you so much for that!), you can do so by clicking here:
www.paypal.com/cgi-bin/webscr?cm…_id=427SCHV94A3BE
You can download this track for free here: savfk.github.io/savfk/the-messenger/
The music in this video is licensed under a ‘Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License (CC BY 4.0)’

Maxwell Anders, Beau Alexander, and Brooklyn Steele explore and share on the ups and downs of dating, sex, relationships, and all things related to the Big D.

On Episode 35 - cliff Diving, Max, Beau, and Brooklyn examine jumping all in and "cliff diving" into relationships.  We meet someone new and we are suddenly wrapped up in excitement and emotion.  Is it fate that someone so perfect crossed paths with us or do we see what we want to see when we want to see it? So We throw caution to the wind and jump in headfirst when it comes to a new relationship.  Could it be that our old habits and desires get in the way when meeting someone new? Do you jump headfirst into your romantic relationships?

Brooklyn makes a monumental announcement with his relationship which calls for a celebration! Maxwell discovers that all isn't as it seems when he has a hookup with a guy who says he is also sober.  Beau is back to work and hit on by an older woman who is convinced he is looking for an older woman.   

Asia from Dallas is our dating guru in the studio.  We answer a listener's e-mail asking about a guy who only texts in the middle of the night with "You Up?" and we review the article “How to Tell If You're Jumping Into a New Relationship Too Soon: Because the "time you were together ÷ 2 = how long you should wait to date" equation doesn't work for anyone.” from Cosmopolitan.com.  We go over our Call to Action, Episode Quote, and we give a shout-out to photographer Guillaume Bigot who gave us a great and memorable photo shoot. Check out Photos by Guillaume site and on Instagram @photosbyguillaume.

Music featured on this episode:

From Russia With Love by Huma-Huma
https://studio.youtube.com/channel/UCmUJTKdQUcUcNdugXjx72AA/music

Woho, I Thought It Be Me & You (ft. Lily Hain) by Leonell Cassio
https://soundcloud.com/leonellcassio
Creative Commons — Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported — CC BY-SA 3.0
Free Download / Stream: https://bit.ly/woho-leonell-cassio
Music promoted by Audio Library https://youtu.be/SGyFvojx2PU

Retreat by Jason Farnham
https://studio.youtube.com/channel/UCmUJTKdQUcUcNdugXjx72AA/music

Maxwell Anders, Beau Alexander, and Brooklyn Steele explore and share on the ups and downs of dating, sex, relationships, and all things related to the Big D.

On Episode 34 - Dogs and other majestic beasts, Max, Beau, and Brooklyn reminisce on how having a beloved pet plays into their dating lives. It is the classic trope, a cute guy playing with a puppy and everyone falls for him.  The couple that meets while at the city dog park and sparks fly.  We love our fur babies.  They pull at our heartstrings and we have such a strong relationship with them. How do our pets play into our dating lives? Do we use them to attract a mate, do we heed the warnings from our pets when they do not like someone new in our life?  Is there a magic equation to balance loving our pets and taking time to date? 

Brooklyn and his partner make time together despite having an increasingly busy schedule and Brooklyn has a new buddy!  Beau is back on the dating apps. He and Max go to a new meeting which to their surprise is filled with beautiful people. Maxwell matches with a handsome guy on a dating site only find out at the date that he has been "kitten-fished."  Later, Max gets nervous and giddy when a pretty girl appears to be flirting with him at Central Market!

We answer a listener's e-mailing asking about dating an ex's brother, and we review the article “Pets and Dating Survey Shows Love of Animals is Key” from barkpost.com. We go over our Call to Action, Episode Quote, and we give a shout out to the various local coffee shops which have remained open during the pandemic. Support your local coffee shops today!

Music featured on this episode:

We Are One by Vexento
https://www.youtube.com/user/Vexento
https://soundcloud.com/vexento
Music promoted by Audio Library
https://youtu.be/Ssvu2yncgWU

Leonell Cassio - A Magical Journey Through Space [Copyright Free/Free To Use]
Stream/Free DL/Buy:
http://bit.ly/AMJTS-FreeDL-Streaming​ (FanLink)
http://bit.ly/AMJTS-Soundcloud​
http://bit.ly/AMJTS-Spotify​
http://bit.ly/AMJTS-iTunes​

The Principle Of Inner Necessity (FREE DOWNLOAD) By Savfk - Music is licensed under a  Creative Commons License.
https://soundcloud.com/savfk/the-principle-of-inner-necessity