Why do AI timelines bend space‑time harder than a black hole? Andrew and Ava take a comedic trek through tech’s eternal “coming soon,” from self‑driving cars stuck in beta purgatory to features that mysteriously “un‑launch” themselves. If you’ve ever refreshed a download page until your F5 key sank into the keyboard, this ode to missed deadlines, quantum roadmaps, and geological patience is for you.

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