Grieving isn't an easy thing. It's ok to cry and feel it through. Think of death as a graduation for your loved one, they've moved on to a much better place. Life is too short not to live your life the way you want and do what you love. Also , life is too short to be holding grudges towards anyone. Let it go you never know when it's the last time you're going to see someone. Stay strong, you got this. ✊🏾💯💙.