It was my girlfriend Sarah's and my one week anniversary. I knew that tonight was going to be the night that we went all the way so I made sure that everything was very special. I took her out for an expensive dinner and desert. Then we had a bottle of wine and shared our innermost thoughts and dreams. Finally we made it back to my apartment and things started going just as I had planned. Once we got really heavy I decided to give Sarah some 'south of the border' pleasure that I was sure she would enjoy. Well, things progressed from there and it was really heating up. Then I suddenly stopped what I was doing and popped up from under the covers. 'Oh my God….What the hell is this!!!' I exclaimed with what I'm sure was a shocked look on my face. In my left hand was a bloody blob about half the size of a human heart. Sarah did a complete 180, going from pleasure to terror, 'What the hell is that Jack?' Her skin went pale as she curled up into a ball on the bed. Just then I blurt out, 'HA HA DUDE, YOU'VE BEEN FETUS-ED!!!! Turn and look at the camera, right over there!' And, again there was no camera. I'm still working on my idea for a reality show pilot, but it's not going as well as I had anticipated. Sarah's in the ICU in a horror-induced coma. I'm in jail and once again, I'm all out of pig fetuses. email: [email protected] web: www.michaeloster.com