What happens when the most emotional decision in a divorce is also the most expensive one? We sit down with top-five loan originator Ben Cohen to map the real choices families face when a house, a mortgage, and a separation collide. From the first “can I keep it?” to the final signatures, we break down how lenders think, what underwriters require, and the smart ways to structure your decree so the numbers actually work.

We start with the human side: why determining whether things are amicable shapes the entire financing path. Then we get into the mechanics. You’ll hear the exact rules for using support to qualify—six months of proven payments and at least three years of continuance—and what to do if the timeline won’t fit standard underwriting. Ben explains portfolio solutions like asset depletion, turning lump sums or investment accounts into qualifying income without forced withdrawals, and how that can open doors for a spouse who hasn’t had reportable earnings.

Rates are the elephant in the room. Many couples are locked into 3 percent loans, yet need a refinance to remove a name or pay out equity. We dig into the tradeoffs: the risk of staying on a joint mortgage, how to negotiate principal pay-downs or support adjustments to keep payments livable, and the powerful difference between rate-and-term and cash-out refinances. One key tip: clear decree language can classify an equity payout as rate-and-term, often earning better pricing than a cash-out. We also tackle second mortgage hurdles, when an ARM may (or may not) help, and how shifting policy and first-time buyer programs can influence affordability.

If you’re navigating a split and a mortgage at the same time, this conversation gives you a playbook: engage a lender early, stress-test scenarios with your attorney, and write your decree to align with lending reality. Subscribe, share this episode with someone who needs it, and leave a review with your biggest mortgage question—we’ll tackle it in a future show.