Divorcing With Sanity

Divorced mums tend to read every moment from her child as proof of damage. However, you need to know that "staying for the kids" often does more harm than good. Leaving a broken marriage breaks the chain of toxic behaviour, and is the biggest favour you did for her. So stop asking what you've done to her, and start seeing what you're showing her.

"You're the one breaking up the family." If your soon-to-be-ex-husband has said this to you, or used your child's future to make you doubt yourself, this episode is for you. Yan shares the story of Eileen, who went from believing his threats to winning custody and getting her life back.

An expat teacher was ready to pack her bags and go home when her divorce happened. Nobody was sacking her. What was threatening her livelihood was her own fears. In this episode, Yan lays out for you what will truly threaten the things you love, and what you need to protect to hold onto what matters to you.

Oooh that big question we all have. How do we let go of the past? How do we forget that toxic a**h****? Every corner you turn, every song that plays in the shopping mall, even a cup of coffee... reminds you of him. You hate that, and you are ashamed of it. In this episode, Yan explores what you are really holding onto, why you remain stuck, and what will help you change that (and no, it's not yoga or pilates). If you have just been through a toxic divorce and are struggling to move on, this is an episode you cannot miss.

The women I work with report a common phenomenon: they start to dream of falling off a cliff. The process of going through a life crisis like divorce literally turns into a nightmare. What if there is something that can cushion this fall and stall time while you figure out your next steps? 30 minutes a week is all it takes, and we all can afford this time in the shower.

Have you been lying awake calling yourself a bad mother, because the divorce left you too exhausted to be mentally present for your children? In this podcast episode of Divorcing With Sanity, we talk about why exhaustion during divorce so easily turns into guilt, what a typical day actually looks like, and why looking after yourself right now isn't selfish - it's how you look after your child too.

You built a whole life here as an expat, then his mistake threatened to destroy it all: your job, your visa, your home. Salt baths, journaling, the horoscope app - they may help for a night, maybe even months, but they're not a plan. This episode is about why self-help remedies can't carry you long term as you reel from the effects of divorce, and what it actually takes, step by step, to build a life you don't need to keep escaping from.

The divorce left you feeling like you're left with nothing, save a few scratches and scars. The blankness feels terrifying. But guess what - it is also the first time in years that nothing (other than you) is dictating what comes next. Now whip out your creativity and dream - what are you going to paint next?

There's a nagging question that haunts you now and even years after a divorce: "What was I thinking??" In this podcast episode from Divorcing With Sanity, we talk about the woman who keeps prosecuting her younger self. But hindsight is 20/20, and you made the you could with what you had. That is enough.

Continuing to do a fantastic performance at work can convince and mislead you into believing you're doing a great job after the divorce (you're not). In this podcast episode of Divorcing With Sanity, Yan talks about why doing less is the secret to protecting and keeping the next most important thing to you after losing your marriage - your job.