When is the last time you looked at yourself in the mirror and asked – “Do I have a sweet heart or a sour heart?” You have one or the other. Which is it? Sweet or sour?

The best way to figure out if you have a sweet heart or sour heart is to entertain some questions. Here we go.

Those questions reveal your defaults when life hands you a lemon. Did you land on the “sweet end” of the spectrum when you answered those questions? Or on the “sour end?” I mean genuinely – out of your heart – no faking or acting. Where you land gives you a strong indication of whether you have a sweet heart or sour heart. And what you practice is what you become.

When you are in a compromised life scenario, you might be churning inside. If you’re at the edge of a bad attitude or negative perspective, you know if you give in – you’re gonna lose. Sweet becomes sour. Still, you might feel desperate, hurt, angry, confused, afraid.

There are 3 things to focus on when you suspect a sour heart starting to form. Please know this. You can hold your ground and not give in to a sour heart. These 3 things enable you to maintain a sweet heart.

But I need to mention something before exploring those 3 focuses. You can’t do this on your own! If you try to stay sweet in your own strength, you’ll probably fail. If, however, you turn to Jesus in your up-ended circumstance, you will succeed. Jesus is never sour, and He will help you stay sweet. Ask for His strength. “Prefer” His ways above your ways in order to stay sweet.

A person’s demeanor is either sweetened or soured by their level of gratitude. That’s where it all starts. When you are thankful, you see good things still present in your life even when you are going through great difficulties. So, maintaining a sweet heart means being grateful. Gratitude launches these 3 practices.

To “hug” the sweet end and “shun” the sour end of heart health, you need discipline.  Hebrews 12:11 says, “No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.”

Discipline in gratitude produces a sweet heart. No wonder God keeps telling His children to be thankful. He knows how He made people. He knows gratitude is better than a multi-vitamin for spiritual health. And He knows it takes discipline to be grateful.

Seems gratitude and discipline are strongly intertwined!

Note: Most of these verses were written in adverse conditions as Paul underwent his own training in gratitude. He chose a grateful heart through discipline, even when he didn’t feel like it. Most of these verses were written while he was in prison.

Launching from a platform of gratitude, perspective is something you have absolute control over. A godly perspective follows hope.  Hebrews 12:2 says to fix our eyes on Jesus who is the author and perfecter of our faith.

Why is intentional focus on Jesus so critical?

Jesus is the example – the model – of perspective while suffering. And Jesus lives inside joy. He is named: Man of Sorrow and Man of Joy.

But, how could Jesus be anointed with the oil of joy when He suffered so much? Jesus knows godly perspective builds hope with a harvest of gratitude. Sweet demeanor requires perspective.

Hope is not a feeling or desire. It’s a chosen outlook you latch onto with all your might by fastening yourself to God. Hope connects to perspective through 5 action steps:

When you have perspective, you believe Jesus will do some pretty awesome exchanges for you. (Is. 61:3) This is what helps you have perspective.

But to receive what God gives, you must let go of losses. To be truly sweet takes what God gives. Again, consider Jesus. He has perspective and hope. Jesus is sweet. Go after Him with passion as your first, most, and best! Adopt His perspective.

“I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of His resurrection and participate in His sufferings, becoming like Him in his death.” (Phil. 3:10)

A sour person is never sincerely grateful. Again, you start from a platform of gratitude. This happens from trusting God’s goodness, wisdom, love, and strength. When things look terrible, when it seems God is not there, when it feels like your prayers hit the ceiling, responding well takes faith.

1 Cor. 10:9-10 identifies two incorrect attitudes that offend God (and He is NOT easily offended):

These do not reflect faith in God. Do you ever do these things?

For our discussion, we will focus on grumbling. These are defining points of grumbling:

Lack of gratitude blocks your ability to recognize God’s provision. It makes you blind to possibilities. And it’s a subtle form of pride. A person who is not grateful is never happy, never content. They often grumble. And they don’t practice faith.

Conversely, when a person is genuinely grateful, they find it a lot harder to sin. It’s a kind of “auto deterrent” for sin. No wonder God repeats His message through Scripture – “be thankful, praise the Lord, have a grateful heart, give thanks.” This is the best way to represent your faith in God.

God formed the human heart. He knows its design. He wants to:

Conclusion

To maintain a sweet heart and prevent souring, practice gratitude. This requires discipline, perspective, and faith. 2 Cor. 2:15 says you can have the sweet aroma of Christ in your life every day in every life circumstance.

“Without faith it is impossible to please God.” (Heb. 11:6) Since this is true, ask yourself some questions:

Skip SOUR! Stay SWEET!

* Much of this post was an excerpt from my book Reach Back: Intentionally Reaching Back to God. To purchase this book, click REACH BACK.