Recorded and Published: November 26, 2018

Call in at 865-268-4005 to leave your question or visit the Krypt at https://kudrinskrypt.com

On this episode of the Krypt I have a fet article and private fet message from a listener about Dom’s using safe words and then I’m going to talk about the Dominants Bill of Rights.

Rules to Love by:
1; Safe, sane, consensual, and informed
2: KNKI: Knowledge, No Intolerance, Kindness, Integrity
3: “Submission is not about authority and it’s not about obedience; it is all about relationships of love and respect.” -Wm. Paul Young

https://fetlife.com/users/3949958/posts/4756802 (AMischiefManaged)

"So I was watching a scene in a play space and I heard something I never expected. In the middle of a scene, a Dominant safeworded. He called "red" and said that he'd like to stop.

What I saw next nearly floored me and hasn't sat well since.

The submissive turned around furious and said: "You can't do that, only I can safeword." She went on shouting about how only submissives have that power and that it's not like she's doing anything to him that he has the right to safeword for. After more yelling, she stormed off, leaving him in the middle of the room probably stun shocked at what happened.

I'm not sure what exactly infuriated me most about watching that unfold in front of me. It could have been the total lack of respect or the feeling like she was treating that dominant like some kinky vending machine. That after negotiation, that he somehow owed her to give her what she wanted.

I didn't want to share this moment when I was in the middle of it. I needed time to process, to decompress it all. It's been a good while between then and now and I've been sitting here at my computer, thinking about what happened that night.

Sitting here wondering if this is part of telling people that submissives have all the power, that they can stop a scene whenever they want with a safeword. When in reality both parties have the power to stop a scene if they feel it isn't what they want, if they feel unsafe, or if they simply don't feel like continuing for whatever reason.

Maybe that night, the dominant felt sick, or something triggered inside of him putting him in a really bad space to play with someone else. Maybe he needed a break because of a muscle cramp, injury, or any number of things that would make it a bad idea to continue. Or maybe he just didn't feel like it anymore.

Thinking back to that night, it would have been such a different story if she tried to connect and communicate. To ask him why he felt like he needed to stop. It could have been a beautiful moment, teaching everyone watching how that care and concern flows both ways."

This one came in from a listener who wishes to remain anonymous:
"You have brought up multiple times on your podcast that you have called an end to a scene far more times as the top than the bottoms ever have. I just wanted to reach out and reiterate the importance of this once again.

My sub and I hadn't done much of a scene in the last few months due to schedules. We had done a couple of shorter scenes at parties and we had done lots of rope suspensions recently, but nothing extreme. So, yesterday we set some time aside for "date night" and had negotiated a predicament, impact, and sensation scene.

However, we started the night with a suspension and that suspension didn't go well. She was in pain, but not alluding to where or what despite my asking. She insisted we just push through finish what I was planning and bring her down. The thing was I hadn't actually planned anything for this session. I was going to bring her up and play around with positioning and how the...