On this week’s episode Jarred and Kyle discuss the weirdest and most interesting news articles from all over the internet, covering everything from: A PA man is in trouble for preforming lewd acts with a dog at a state park (honestly all we know for sure is he was naked in front of the dog they kept backtracking on the amount of dog fuckery), Chicago car chase leads to the Calumet Mall where 3 boys changed clothes and evaded arrest (we're pretty sure life is a simulation and it works on GTA Logic), New Mexico woman gets a hot dog from Sonic and realizes there's more cocaine on it than she asked for, Floridaman gets bit by a family member and almost loses his leg to necrotizing fasciitis (also people's fingernails are dirtier than originally thought so new fear unlocked), and a very Rum Runna Story of a man stealing a Captain Morgan statue in FL (apparently you can't do Pirate Stuff to Pirate Things...hypocrites!) Also Captain Morgan was a real dude.

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Featured Stories / Sources:

Dog Fucker / Fox News:

https://www.fox43.com/article/news/crime/themis-matsoukas-arrest-lewd-acts-rothrock-state-forest/521-c69de662-b274-4589-aece-e46f2dde4861?fbclid=IwAR1bcbDvkealqZfv980Ho7krAXLIMwZQO2e6MW9KO8wCP2G_56NqdfHz-E4_aem_th_AcQfzxlVA7EGjohhDo26v3dOlvpD9QSHsX6hPeNoGvnWIPbtKPD3ybaCeoPLuygNtJY&mibextid=DcJ9fc

Video Game Logic / CBS News:

https://www.cbsnews.com/chicago/news/dan-ryan-chase-calumet-city/?utm_source&fbclid=IwAR3KpwlRFxRQHlR06auqmjEFdb3DKgdqQQjX4iA_UvAxlxGY1jt2xxGmV8Q_aem_th_AcSnqoHLxW4oFDdjN11v8ngPWGLah6enag_qisbTO7pbeIuGx9wt2MdnvgdMJGyStMI&mibextid=DcJ9fc

I'll take a Cocaine Dog Extra Cocaine / KOB4:

https://www.kob.com/new-mexico/new-mexico-woman-finds-cocaine-on-sonic-hot-dog/?_sc_token=v2%253AQYyFT7_4puOYcPAI0bEUb7FDh-BM4NBZ2g1t-ygCPbMNc3yASD1q9MmXy2Vshzx-7_UGBJ736N90IMt1OtrlzXxxMd84xSONUJfNcYS2Qhhqtt0Vlzi3FlnybIOV-QN71hoAK8rFGzoZVEG1rLCAbrhB7zo9vbCW4x0ZrvvUbfdMPciLIgRdB-SDroqcSFidTbz_Co_H8MQKX3ILQut55Q%253D%253D&fbclid=IwAR19rkwST2xcTjcC3lasxZ46Q_on_y86J-BQNn-54mbGBI_ld4LQhXcgUBM_aem_th_AcTmrjQVwYAQKaATc65DVYdWrVwLI2LyBWaR_gp41MssFM-t3Ll06_4fmJGFGngfu5I&mibextid=DcJ9fc

Florida always got Zombies / NBCNews:

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/florida-man-flesh-eating-disease-bite-family-brawl-rcna88553?utm_source&fbclid=IwAR3tSOAaPVoY_QgXaOJ2Wi3hbWhRDp2knTeXiRFKUy-WTlTGEYC9WaB1UkE_aem_th_AcTDNX9LMdSmcIXds7e86-rYuMAJuRjhrntLRpQJxTBYdcZ7C2ktOcOon02vY9lc65Y&mibextid=DcJ9fc

A very Rum Runnas Story / Local10:

https://www.local10.com/news/florida/2023/06/08/florida-man-steals-captain-morgan-statue/?utm_source&fbclid=IwAR3CGMy3Nn1QVJvXWSRFQW2QeiCpP7WG6U1cXNFzlu6gR4ZrfD483ATzDm4_aem_th_AcTm9374sJ8hJK3cMi36HJd7Wft9u8zErYzTjFmnHBX-yWV_EKSAUv0m3Mx0YHwcQdI&mibextid=DcJ9fc

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