I thought that it was important that I share with you some of the drawbacks and effects of weight-focused traditional health care.

What do I mean right this...   

We have all been to the doctors and we dread going to the doctors. Because let's face it, most of the time we only go when we're sick, right?

At least I do.

I'm not a big fan of those germ-filled offices full of snotty noses. And who knows what else? But to make matters worse, as soon as they call your name and drag you back through those doors to the waiting room, you get to stand in the hallway on this wonderful scale as the nurse writes down your number. Then takes your blood pressure maybe you're on to states and your temperature for me walking in, and walking through those doors.

I felt like a shame spiral soon as I stepped on that scale and saw that number and you could hear the nurse that she was writing it down. Just take a deep breath.

And I know it's not just me.

This was a huge issue for me, and as soon as I walked into the office and sat down and had a conversation with the doctor, you would hear, I would hear things like, "you really need to get your weight under control. You need to go on a diet, you need to change your body, you need to change this.".

I am heaviest  I've ever been, but now I am off almost all of my medications and doing well. I am actually happy, happy in my body, happy in my life happy in all of these different areas of my life.

So I have had a chronic illness, since I was... Well, I was diagnosed at 13, so I've been going to a lot of doctors and a lot of psychologists and therapists and I'm not saying it, by any means. Any of them had any ill effects or bad things? They all did good things for me, but there were as an underlying thing that they didn't do... Nobody ever asked me about what I was eating or how I actually felt about the way my body looked.

Yes, they asked me how I felt and that was depressed, and unhappy, and they always related it to events, not to the image that I held in my mind about myself, so recently, as I go to the doctors and get on the scales and hear a sigh. 

I am more active, more energy happier. I'm living a more fulfilled life. Why do I need to change anything? And the suggestion they gave me was this medically supervised shake fasting, it was five shakes a day, and you had to commit to four months in the program, at least like four months of liquid shakes. Only with ingredients that I can't even pronounce now. A freaking  NO thank you.

So I asked, I bluntly, I am and ask What are the benefits of actually losing the weight, what are the benefits?

What am I gonna get out of putting my body through this torture?

And these severe deprivations of food going to do for me besides destroying my gut bio do besides just create all this internal stress on my body. Weight cycling is not healthy losing weight, that fast is not healthy.

There are so many things out there, and I know that there's so much misinformation and a lot of our medical doctors don't get nutritional classes or they have one class. I think that's required. And with all this miscommunication this misinformation and this weight focus, it's absolutely insane.

I heard today somebody mentioned to me that a lot of athletes are even considered obese. Or what about the person that is underweight, that's trying to gain weight? Nobody's actually asking how we're doing things, how we're feeling in our bodies, how we're interacting in the world. There's not that connection.

I had an eating disorder for 20 years, and no one ever diagnosed me how, with all the doctors I went to, all the psychologists, all the therapists out of all the treatment. I was getting, How did nobody ever recognize my eating disorder? Why did it take 20 years to actually get this diagnosis which was liberating to me 'cause now I can actually do something about it. Instead of just hope to be hopeful that something's gonna change.

So, my focus goes back to that damn scale. You don't have to get on it, if you are not going to the doctor because you feel shame about getting on that scale, you can tell them, No, you don't have to be weight, it's your right to stand up for yourself and say, No, I'm not coming here for my weight.

There are some things that they need your weight for if you're having surgery for anesthesia. For medication purposes yeah, they need to know your weight. Other than that, they can take that scale.

 The health at every size movement is proving that and it's so refreshing to see all this body positivity and the wonderful things in the world that are coming out to make us feel better in our bodies, but it all starts with loving yourself. When I gave up dieting when I gave up my focus on what my body looked like, and I actually started living my life in this present moment being grateful that my body allowed me to stand up. Yeah, on some days, standing up, her like how... But I was still able to stand up, I was still able to walk and do the things I was still able to open my eyes and see. These are all the things you take for granted until the day you can't do them anymore. And there were days that I couldn't walk that I would crawl places until I had surgery to fix my back, it made me, more grateful.

So, if anything, my chronic illness, has made me more grateful for a lot of things, but going to the doctors as much as I did just increased my focus on weight, and my dissatisfaction with my body and myself.  It made me feel not good enough, it made me feel shame, it made me not wanna go unless I really had to go.

And I want you to be aware that it's okay to say no, it's okay to not get on the scale, you can refuse to do that and still get service there is not a need for your weight. The majority of the time. So say no if you're not going to the doctor because of the shame about getting on that scale, don't get on the doctor at all. 

I know I have a friend that put it off going to see her doctor for a really long time, because of that scale fear, and she really needed to be treated way before she got treated. So just make sure you know that and feed your body with love because there's nothing else that's the root of everything.

If you're not feeling like enough.

If you're not feeling the energy you want.

If you're not feeling your life is going where you want it to go, you need to focus inwardly because nothing outwardly is going to fill that gap.

Focus on yourself, get the help that you need for your health, whether that's traditional healthcare or an alternative healthcare hiring a coach having a friend that can support you through the process, but go inward and find out why these things are coming up, figure it out, dig deep, and if you are in real need, again, I'm always here, you can always reach out to me, but I do have my free community, the future body with love community hanging out on Facebook, where we're doing this together, we're rising together we are coming up together and breaking free from this traditional health care and this weight phobia, and this fatphobia and this body is shaming and body hatred.

We're really rising together in there. It's where you can share your struggles, your successes.

And we just, again, we rise together. It is such a safe community and I'm just loving being in there.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/feedyourbodywithlove/

 And again, it's free so if you're struggling and you wanna test the waters to see if the feed your body with love movement, is for you or if intuitive eating is for you. Because yes, we still do talk about food, because nutrition and movement is an important piece of being healthy.

However, if it is not fun, it does not belong in your life, if you're not having fun, if you're not enjoying the exercise, don't do it, find something that works for you, if you're not enjoying your food, it becoming a chore, or super restrictive and you're not having fun, change it and change it in a way that feels good be intuitive.

You know what's best for your body, but if you need help rising together again, get your body over to the feature body with love community because we will accept you with open loving arms because you deserve to be happy, you deserve to love the body you love and you deserve to feed your body with love. So I will talk to you next time. Have the most amazing day. Wait, don't have the most amazing day go up and make today amazing because you are beautiful, and you freaking deserve it.

I love you.