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Bond markets from Berlin to Tokyo went feral, yields spiking to heights not seen since 2011, turning government borrowing into a public humiliation ritual. Trump’s cheap shots at the Fed echoed through Europe, with central bankers warning that when monetary policy becomes a punchline, the bill lands on every household mortgage. And Southeast Asia is scarfing down U.S. grain like it’s the last buffet line before famine, rerouting trade while agribusiness laughs all the way to the silo.

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