They say that Pain is mandatory, but suffering is optional. On the fourth anniversary of the Seal Beach Salon shooting that happened in Dr. Marissa's hometown, Grief and Healing is the focus of today's show using the Life Balance Coaching process with Vanessa....who lost her sister, mother, her husband and her daughter (2 months ago) in a short span of 3 years. Tears are the disinfectant that keep your heart soft and free from infection...that can happen when you go from one extreme of not processing and burying grief at all, to the other extreme and marinating in it by continuing to revisit and getting stuck in the pain. Vanessa is encouraged to feel, to find the bottom of the black hole and to let the tears flow...remembering not just the circumstances of their passing but bringing to mind and heart beautiful memories of her time with her loved ones. Dr. Marissa explains how choosing to believe that life is eternal and that love will never die is a belief system that helps you feel good about being alive and that those loved ones are just transitioning to another place where we can all meet again one day. In a heart warming and honest session with someone who has enough reason to blame and rant and wallow in despair, Dr. Marissa encourages Vanessa to feel her feelings and share her pain to help others heal themselves. Episode sponsored by Salt Oasis and www.4Balance.org