What does power mean to you? Taking charge or taking care? If you are female (or support “feminine” values) research suggests you want the power to do both.

The problem is that some jobs only reward competitive thinkers who define power as the ability to dominate (“own the market,” “kill the competition”). These kinds of jobs leave collaborative thinkers thirsty for the joy and benefits of care-taking.

In highly competitive systems, providing care, nurturing the weak, or passing up short term wins for long term gains is unrewarded or even punished as a lost opportunity to dominate. These restrictions generate enough “moral distress” that we leave or fail to apply. When accepting a hyper-competitive job feels like you have sold your soul, no salary can compensate us enough to stay.