DS 025: Managing Unmet Expectations in Pregnancy, Birth and Motherhood with Aubrey Phelps

Aubrey Phelps is a Cleveland, Ohio mom who is no stranger to unmet expectations. She did everything right during her pregnancies – all the right nutrition, fitness and birth preparations. And she had high hopes for her babies’ births and motherhood journey. But her children’s births and first years were nothing like she had imagined. A good reminder that while we can prepare all we want, our babies are going to be born the way they’re meant to be born. Listen to her story here – and stick around to the end for an encouraging message about babies choosing their parents wisely! Trigger Warning: In today’s episode, we talk about birth trauma, emergency cesarean section, premature birth, postpartum depression, postpartum anxiety and post-traumatic stress disorder. If this is something you do not feel comfortable with listening to today, we suggest passing on this episode and circling back to it when you’re ready. If you’re struggling with birth trauma, perinatal mood disorder, or healing from unmet expectations of motherhood, you may want to consider consulting with your care provider, therapist or one of the support groups listed on our website.  SHOW NOTES:  1:45 - Intro to episode 3:00 – Candace what’s up Otto is 6 months Otto’s Baptism Ticks in the house! 7:20 - Anna’s what’s up Dean has been sick, calling the pediatrician at 2:00 a.m. 13:15 - Aubrey what’s up Celebrating her daughter’s second birthday, 7 tier rainbow cake! 17:20 – Introduction to Aubrey 19:15 – Aubrey starts her story The birth story of her first son Emergency C section He was a tough baby - crying all the time Identifying her postpartum anxiety Her son was a difficult nurser, she had a heavy letdown Embracing her C section scar Weaning and getting period back to prepare for 2ndchild, seed cycling 34:00 – Planning for baby #2 Getting pregnant with second child Implantation bleeding John’s West Shore Midwives Bleeding during pregnancy High blood pressure Preeclampsia Issues during spinal Meeting her daughter for the first time Difficulties breastfeeding and long term pumping, G tube Postpartum issues - seeing therapist, not having time to realize she needed help again 47:33 – Mindset shift after second baby. “I hadn’t failed. She was going to be born early and have feeding issues. She picked us. She knew we could handle it.” 51:00 – Having a child in the NICU and another at home Feeling cheated of time and experiences Leaving a child at the hospital and having to go home Being on house arrest with no visitors because of germs 53:30 Recommended that you see a therapist She is diagnosed PPD, PTSD, PPA You need a village to get through these things Social media is a highlight reel showing only the good news Going out of the house and seeing other happy, healthy children was difficult 55:50 – How long until you felt comfortable going out of the house? Going out with the G tube and pumping Supply and night pumping for extended period of time Supplementing with donor breastmilk – Human Milk for Human Babies 59:00 – How her daughter is now SOS Approach to Feeding Anxiety with this new change Division of responsibility Weaned in two months Baby led weaning 1:09:00 – Advice for anyone struggling with unmet expectations (birth trauma, breastfeeding, parenting, etc.) Both, And * A great reminder and life lesson! 1:11:00 – Owning your story without caveats or excuses 1:12:15 – Dealing with postpartum issues after - exercise, taking care of yourself, therapist Finding the right therapist Medication, breastfeeding while on medication 1:16:05 – How do you feel you’re Delivering Strength?   Find Aubrey Online: Website: Backtoscratch.Net Instagram: instagram.com/aub_the_rd   Delivering Strength: Find Us Online Website – www.deliveringstrength.com Facebook – www.facebook.com/deliveringstrength Instagram – www.instagram.com/deliveringstrength Facebook Community – www.facebook.com/groups/DeliveringStrength/ If you have show topics or guests that you’d like to recommend to us, please feel free to send us a message through our website or send us an email at [email protected]. Find Dr. Candace Gesicki, DC at Cleveland Chiropractic & Integrative Health Center or Birthfit Cleveland. We’d love to hear from you! Do you have comments on today’s episode? Ideas for future episodes? Questions for us? Send them to us at [email protected].