Mel rants about the state of American cuisine: what the elites think is for dinner, Californians drinking their own urine, Bill Gates bullying American farmers, and the terrible scourge of cow farts. Meanwhile in Iowa, Satanists are victimized by a hate crime when a statue of Baphomet loses its head, leading Eli to give a long-winded sermon about how stupid people are on "X" and how great worshiping Satan really is! And of course, stay tuned to the very end to find out who the Piece of Shit of the Week is. All of this and more when the DUSE After Dark asks... Where's The Beef?