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[E31] Behavior Week: The Golden Rule Is Wrong
7 Billion people on the planet.
Everyone is different. They have all had a unique
experience in life, a different path, different combination of personality,
traits, talents, strengths, and ways they see the world.
Yet here we are, the beginning of a two-week series of
episodes on behaviors and personalities.
Over the next ten episodes I am going to break down the
population into four groups, and then share each group’s biggest fears, how
they deal with confrontation, how they empathize with other people, and then
how they like to buy, what not to do if you want to close the sale, and how you
the salesperson shows up based on your personality group.
All of this is my ten-minute show format. And with the
goal of providing you actionable insight for improving not just your selling
effectiveness but your relationships in general.
Check out this episode where I kick off Behavior Week(s)
and find out why the Golden Rule is wrong.
Episode 31 – Transcript
On this episode I kick off two weeks of talking about
behaviors. Prepare to take your sales and relationship game to the next level!
Welcome to episode 31 of The Sales Experience Podcast. And
welcome to the first of two Behavior Weeks.
Depending on how you feel about them, maybe you like
people or maybe you just know you have to deal with them. If you are in sales I
am hoping that you actually like talking to and working with people. But
honestly, people are the most challenging aspect of a sales career. Actually,
that is true about life in general, all relationships have the potential of
being challenging because everyone has a different personality, different
behaviors, different experiences and views on the world. Everyone has been
through a different path in life to get where they are now – this point in time
where you are meeting them, whether it is a personal relationship, in the
context of your sales role, or even next to you in line at the store.
So if everyone is as different as a fingerprint or a
snowflake, then it would be really difficult to be able to assess their
personality and behavior style and then utilize that information in order to
maximize your effectiveness with them, right? If you have ever taking a Myers
Briggs personality test, you know there
is a lot of questions – 93 in fact. 93 questions where you have to make
decisions between the options and at the end you will get a very detailed but
complex summary of your personality.
If you are talking to a prospect you can’t just pause
your process and have them take a test like that. That is not realistic in
pretty much any selling situation and would seem a bit creepy. But the feedback
you would get from a test like that could help in so many ways.
You see, while each person is different there are some
generalities that occur. And when you are talking with a prospect there are
certain ways to treat each personality group and things to avoid doing if you
want to make the sale. When you break it down to four main groups, instead of
the 16 from Myers Briggs or other tests, it becomes easier to work with the
prospect.
While we know everyone is different, there are ways that
people generally respond the same way to life. It may not 100% accurate for all
people you try and put into one of four behavior buckets, but you can get
really close and have a more effective sales conversation.
Members of each group has a shared big fear. They have
their own way they like to buy. They have major turn offs that if a sales
person does them it will make the sale infinitely harder to close. They have
common likes and dislikes. They even have a certain level of confrontation they
are wired for, as well as how they empathize with other people.
How could you make those statements about a group of
people – especially breaking down the population into only four groups of
personalities and behaviors? Again – Myers Briggs is great at getting really
specific for an individual but is too complex for most sales people to use. I
have seen people who have studied it for years and can generally assess someone
pretty quick, but to learn and memorize 16 different personalities and their
traits isn’t easy. But if you go high
enough level with four groupings than you can create a mental tool to help with
your sales effectiveness, and even your other relationships in life.
That is my goal for these two weeks is to share with you
the four different personality and behavior groups and how to work with each
one. My hope is that you would be able to improve your EQ – Emotional
intelligence – to help you tune in to the other person at an even deeper level
of understanding.
There is another reason this is so important if you are
in sales – and really, in life. Most people know themselves really really well.
You have lived your life for a long time, in your own head, with your
experiences, and your view of the world through your lenses. Whether you are
self-aware at a deeper level of your strengths and weaknesses, habits and preferences
is nice and should be a goal in order to maximize who are and what you can do
for other people. But no matter what, we all have our default system mode,
which could change over time but is always present in the moment.
The challenge is that most people default to a version of
the Golden Rule that doesn’t work. The Golden Rule says to treat others like
you like to be treated. If you want to be treated with respect and love, and
kindness then treat others that way. How could this be a bad thing or
ineffective way to interact with others? Well each of those four groups that I
will cover has a different way they like to buy, how they like to be treated,
and as I mentioned, a way that a sales person could totally kill the deal. But
if you, the sales person, is running on auto pilot, you will come to each
selling situation with your view on things, which is one quarter of the
population. Your mind is in one group, which is fine, but what if your
preferences for buying and selling are polar opposites to the person you are
talking to.
You know how they say that opposites attract? They do,
and if you have ever been in one of those relationships with someone who is
totally different from you personality, behavior, and preferences wise, then
you know that times it can be amazing…but…at times, and maybe most times, it
will complete and utter friction and potentially drama.
Now imagine that as the relationship you have between you
and your prospect. And then you do not close the deal. But you don’t know why.
Want an example? The classic sales person personality is
about fun, charisma, and maybe even happy hours. Work hard, play hard – right?
Or…work some, play hard! When they talk to prospects they are all about how
great their product service is, how much fun it is, or how cool it is. But if
that sales person is talking to an analytical prospect, the prospect doesn’t
care as much about fun or cool or hip, as much as they care about value and
function and the data. That type of prospect also really hates high pressure
sales situations, which is a complete mismatch for the style that I bet the
sales person will hit them with. This relationship is two people who are
opposites, and it will most likely not end well.
This is why its so critical for a sales person who has a
goal of being a long term professional to be able to understand the other
person on a basic level, and quickly in the process, in order to meet them
where they are at instead of forcing the sales rep’s Golden Rule personality
style on them.
Now there are sales people who already do this because
they have an intuitive sense. You will hear them tell you something like “I
know how to read people” – that is what they are doing. Maybe it comes
naturally, maybe they have just been reading people their whole life and now
its second nature. For the rest of us, I will give you a framework to do the
same thing and then if you practice it enough it will become second nature for
you as well.
That’s it for this start of the new week of episodes. Make
sure to subscribe wherever you are downloading episodes from so you can get the
latest episodes each day.
And until next time, always remember that everything in
life is sales and people will remember the experience you gave them.
View all episodes
By Jason Cutter
4.9
3535 ratings
7 Billion people on the planet.
Everyone is different. They have all had a unique
experience in life, a different path, different combination of personality,
traits, talents, strengths, and ways they see the world.
Yet here we are, the beginning of a two-week series of
episodes on behaviors and personalities.
Over the next ten episodes I am going to break down the
population into four groups, and then share each group’s biggest fears, how
they deal with confrontation, how they empathize with other people, and then
how they like to buy, what not to do if you want to close the sale, and how you
the salesperson shows up based on your personality group.
All of this is my ten-minute show format. And with the
goal of providing you actionable insight for improving not just your selling
effectiveness but your relationships in general.
Check out this episode where I kick off Behavior Week(s)
and find out why the Golden Rule is wrong.
Episode 31 – Transcript
On this episode I kick off two weeks of talking about
behaviors. Prepare to take your sales and relationship game to the next level!
Welcome to episode 31 of The Sales Experience Podcast. And
welcome to the first of two Behavior Weeks.
Depending on how you feel about them, maybe you like
people or maybe you just know you have to deal with them. If you are in sales I
am hoping that you actually like talking to and working with people. But
honestly, people are the most challenging aspect of a sales career. Actually,
that is true about life in general, all relationships have the potential of
being challenging because everyone has a different personality, different
behaviors, different experiences and views on the world. Everyone has been
through a different path in life to get where they are now – this point in time
where you are meeting them, whether it is a personal relationship, in the
context of your sales role, or even next to you in line at the store.
So if everyone is as different as a fingerprint or a
snowflake, then it would be really difficult to be able to assess their
personality and behavior style and then utilize that information in order to
maximize your effectiveness with them, right? If you have ever taking a Myers
Briggs personality test, you know there
is a lot of questions – 93 in fact. 93 questions where you have to make
decisions between the options and at the end you will get a very detailed but
complex summary of your personality.
If you are talking to a prospect you can’t just pause
your process and have them take a test like that. That is not realistic in
pretty much any selling situation and would seem a bit creepy. But the feedback
you would get from a test like that could help in so many ways.
You see, while each person is different there are some
generalities that occur. And when you are talking with a prospect there are
certain ways to treat each personality group and things to avoid doing if you
want to make the sale. When you break it down to four main groups, instead of
the 16 from Myers Briggs or other tests, it becomes easier to work with the
prospect.
While we know everyone is different, there are ways that
people generally respond the same way to life. It may not 100% accurate for all
people you try and put into one of four behavior buckets, but you can get
really close and have a more effective sales conversation.
Members of each group has a shared big fear. They have
their own way they like to buy. They have major turn offs that if a sales
person does them it will make the sale infinitely harder to close. They have
common likes and dislikes. They even have a certain level of confrontation they
are wired for, as well as how they empathize with other people.
How could you make those statements about a group of
people – especially breaking down the population into only four groups of
personalities and behaviors? Again – Myers Briggs is great at getting really
specific for an individual but is too complex for most sales people to use. I
have seen people who have studied it for years and can generally assess someone
pretty quick, but to learn and memorize 16 different personalities and their
traits isn’t easy. But if you go high
enough level with four groupings than you can create a mental tool to help with
your sales effectiveness, and even your other relationships in life.
That is my goal for these two weeks is to share with you
the four different personality and behavior groups and how to work with each
one. My hope is that you would be able to improve your EQ – Emotional
intelligence – to help you tune in to the other person at an even deeper level
of understanding.
There is another reason this is so important if you are
in sales – and really, in life. Most people know themselves really really well.
You have lived your life for a long time, in your own head, with your
experiences, and your view of the world through your lenses. Whether you are
self-aware at a deeper level of your strengths and weaknesses, habits and preferences
is nice and should be a goal in order to maximize who are and what you can do
for other people. But no matter what, we all have our default system mode,
which could change over time but is always present in the moment.
The challenge is that most people default to a version of
the Golden Rule that doesn’t work. The Golden Rule says to treat others like
you like to be treated. If you want to be treated with respect and love, and
kindness then treat others that way. How could this be a bad thing or
ineffective way to interact with others? Well each of those four groups that I
will cover has a different way they like to buy, how they like to be treated,
and as I mentioned, a way that a sales person could totally kill the deal. But
if you, the sales person, is running on auto pilot, you will come to each
selling situation with your view on things, which is one quarter of the
population. Your mind is in one group, which is fine, but what if your
preferences for buying and selling are polar opposites to the person you are
talking to.
You know how they say that opposites attract? They do,
and if you have ever been in one of those relationships with someone who is
totally different from you personality, behavior, and preferences wise, then
you know that times it can be amazing…but…at times, and maybe most times, it
will complete and utter friction and potentially drama.
Now imagine that as the relationship you have between you
and your prospect. And then you do not close the deal. But you don’t know why.
Want an example? The classic sales person personality is
about fun, charisma, and maybe even happy hours. Work hard, play hard – right?
Or…work some, play hard! When they talk to prospects they are all about how
great their product service is, how much fun it is, or how cool it is. But if
that sales person is talking to an analytical prospect, the prospect doesn’t
care as much about fun or cool or hip, as much as they care about value and
function and the data. That type of prospect also really hates high pressure
sales situations, which is a complete mismatch for the style that I bet the
sales person will hit them with. This relationship is two people who are
opposites, and it will most likely not end well.
This is why its so critical for a sales person who has a
goal of being a long term professional to be able to understand the other
person on a basic level, and quickly in the process, in order to meet them
where they are at instead of forcing the sales rep’s Golden Rule personality
style on them.
Now there are sales people who already do this because
they have an intuitive sense. You will hear them tell you something like “I
know how to read people” – that is what they are doing. Maybe it comes
naturally, maybe they have just been reading people their whole life and now
its second nature. For the rest of us, I will give you a framework to do the
same thing and then if you practice it enough it will become second nature for
you as well.
That’s it for this start of the new week of episodes. Make
sure to subscribe wherever you are downloading episodes from so you can get the
latest episodes each day.
And until next time, always remember that everything in
life is sales and people will remember the experience you gave them.