Yes I have my three brothers, My dad’s side of the family and my husband’s family, but nothing will ever feel the same. The feeling of aloneness runs deep. No longer having a relationship with my brother, sister and mother . What choice would I have left? Being treated like the family bank, the black sheep or the one who gets the blame for everything. I had no other choice but to leave. No one will never know truth because I will always be painted in a bad light to save their reputation. I was always good at disappearing because no one would never find me. You always have been and will be on your own. No one will ever understand why you are so independent and why you don’t ask for help.

I am kind but I am not stupid. I focused on my life and goals.

The haters who are trash will always take themselves out. They will never take accountability.

I am allowed to share my story. This part of story. I don’t care how uncomfortable this makes you, maybe you should of though of

consequences of what you did. Now this is part of my story, I share

everything. I don’t leave nothing out. Maybe there were certain things I shouldn’t have said because it wasn’t appropriate, but you chose to break my confidentiality.  I do take accountability for my mistakes, but I will never take accountability for the pain that you caused . So oh well, while I have been healing, I won’t let no one go

through what I went through. To

be a doctor or manager, and you break someone’s confidentiality. You run your mouth, that’s something that can’t be forgotten. Healing is knowing some people will never be an adult and take accountability. That’s fine, but least I’m not living with guilt.

You will never find me again, and don’t pretend when time passes that I forgot or it’s water under the bridge.  You only showed back up, thinking I forgot or I would let what you did slide, no I let you think that. You played checkers while I was playing chess. I was healing, not lashing out because I was angry or hurt. I waited to be healed to stand up and share the truth. I don’t care how bad it makes you look. You built your life on hurting others. If you can’t throw and get back what you threw in return, then don’t. Running your mouth thinking you had the upper hand, all it did was make you look stupid. I never once treated you unfairly, I treated you with respect, but you won’t share that side of the story because everyone will question your story. I could have done more, but did I, no. You still have job because I didn’t go any further. You should be thankful but you think you escaped

the consequences. I let God handle this situation, and I waited for right time to share the truth. I will never let this down. You broke my confidentiality and shared it to the whole store. There was no closure or apology, you avoid me because you are guilty. I am the greatest thing you lost, because I actually cared. 

They failed at their own game. All the lies they spread because they couldn’t keep their mouth shut. Not only is their group of haters that also don’t like you as well, well all them are falling in the same trap. You aren’t angry at them, but you have nothing to do with them.  We ain’t angry at you, because you created your own downfall. Your story where you left the important parts out of how you broke several laws that dealt with HIPPA. You think I would forget? Where I shared the parts that you left out. Don’t act nice to me or pretend we are cool. You don’t exist to me. You can lie but the truth will come to light. You run from the truth and the ones you hurt, but karma does come back for you.  I’m not angry, but I won’t lie to

protect your innocent name, when

you didn’t care about sharing information to your group of haters. Where you had no permission and you broke my confidentiality and violated HIPPA. Maybe one day you will change and make amends, but it sounds like to me you have a track record. You play the victim but never take accountability.

To heal instead of lashing out when you are hurt. You knew it took time, but to smile when things get hard is knowing you are in a better place. When you tell the ones you trust what that individual did to you. That they can’t be trusted because they broke your confidentiality to the whole store. It’s not out of revenge or anger, you don’t want anyone else to go through what you went through.  You are at peace and accept your mistakes and the lessons that were taught during that painful time. Even though it was a year ago, it still hits you like it was yesterday when it happened, but you know you survived. 

All I gave you is gone, nothing could replace this moment. Walking on egg shells each moment was testing your anger. Getting mad over the smallest of things, it all fell down. Nothing would never change or make you proud or happy. Taking credit for what I did or saying if it wasn’t for you. Always being brought up when the subject had nothing to do with me. Getting it from all sides, just keep my name out of your mouth. I never once spoke shit about you or disrespected you, but that only gave you another reason to disrespect me. Cutting ties from family members would be hardest thing any human would have to do. Moving forward with only yourself, they will always believe lies. While you tried your best for them to see the truth that they refuse to see. I gave all my pieces of myself that are not only missing but can never be replaced.

Don’t think showing back where I am, thinking I forgot what you did. It’s not my problem that the guilt is eating you alive, maybe you should have thought twice. I am not in the mood to forgive you right now. It would be in your best interest to stay away from me. Not only did you break my confidentiality, you shared it with the world. So yes, I’m pissed, the punishment you got, you deserve. Even months later it still burns. This is about the both of you breaking laws. This goes beyond just your typical bully who doesn’t know how to handle their jealousy. Rusting my sparkle was goal, which blew up in your face. I’m doing better, while healing and you are living in misery. Maybe you learned now how to keep your mouth shut. Being the loud one gets you nowhere but in trouble, While the quiet one has nothing to hide. 

The consequences I get when I survived the worse nightmare of my life. Being diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and CPS (Central Pain Syndrome), from being in survival mode. Being mentally, physically, emotionally and sexually abused two weeks before my thirteen birthday, By someone I wasn’t related to. I don’t blame my parents. Still the flashbacks and nightmares waking up in sweat or crying still haunts me. I won’t go any deeper because it still hurts. You think years later you would be healed, but it’s the opposite. You are learning to break bad habits and to unlearn the way you were while you were in survival mode. Being blamed for something that you didn’t cause, or told it never happened or you’re not telling the whole truth, you were never there so how would you know? You still don’t feel safe, but you don’t blame yourself anymore. God got you out of this dark moment. You and him have a long history, but you survive because of God. To face this is realizing you will never get over this just like when someone passes away. You learn to be okay, but it will come back in waves. You are in a better place and that’s all that matters.