Have you ever had an interaction with a coworker that you think you handled fairly well but then it derails the rest of your day? Gaining a higher level of emotional intelligence just may be the key not only to keeping your day on track but in advancing your career as well.  On this career development episode of The Digital Enterprise Society podcast, Thom Singer welcomes Black Diamond Leadership owner Robert Grossman for a conversation about emotional intelligence, self-mastery, and psychological safety. Robert works with teams to create high level engagement and performance, and he has joined the podcast today to share insights into the importance of self-mastery, how to minimize the aftermath of an emotional outburst, and how to achieve a higher level of psychological safety at work and in the world. 

 

On today’s podcast, you will learn:

 

Why self-mastery and emotional intelligence matter

• Emotional intelligence is recognizing that human beings are emotionally driven and experience life emotionally first. 

• The fight-or-flight mechanism is engaged whenever we confront something challenging. 
• Emotional intelligence allows us to engage the rational brain to make sense of perceived and real situations. 
• Work, family, and social engagements are all improved with refined emotional intelligence. 
• Emotionally charged situations do not reflect what is really happening, but our brains cannot distinguish between what is real and what is imagined. 

 

How to minimize the aftermath of an emotional outburst

• Stewing over past conflict prevents you from being present with current circumstances. 
• Too much time is wasted thinking about how things could have been handled differently. 
• The response chain can help to minimize emotionally triggering reactions. 
• Identify the story that your brain is telling you and compare it to the facts you have. 

 

Survival or self-mastery- which is best? 

• We respond to situations out of either survival or self-mastery. 
• A survival response includes blaming other people, assuming no responsibility, zero growth from a situation, and an element of living in the past. 
• Survival responses tend to create additional survival reactions in the future. 
• Self-mastery is the process of identifying survival reactions, then learning and growing from them. 

 

The 4 paradigms of response

• Fear is the natural way of being, blames others, and is reactive rather than responsive. 
• Duty reflects seeking safety through conforming and rule following. 
• Achievement means striving to look good for other people until something disrupts that. 
• Integrity assumes responsibility for our behavior, responding to situations rather than reacting to them, and generally presents multiple ways to solve a problem. 

 

The value of psychological safety in the workplace

• Psychological safety has increased in importance as a result of the pandemic. 
• Every member of the team needs to feel comfortable speaking up without fear of retribution. 
• When achieved, this level of safety leads to learning and innovation. 
• In a high psychological safety environment, team members feel comfortable admitting mistakes quickly and taking corrective action. 
• A study by Google showed that psychological safety is the number one predictor of the success of a team. 

 

Advice for anyone who wants to thrive in their career

• A Harvard study showed that people with a higher degree of emotional intelligence advance in their organizations and make more money. 
• Developing emotional intelligence has profound workplace and real-life ramifications for everyone. 

 

Continue the conversation with us within the Digital Enterprise Society Community at www.DigitalEnterpriseSociety.org.

 

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