The Ten Thousand Things

Envy

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Study envy to find messages from our future selves

We unpack the role of envy, not as a toxic emotion to be avoided or ashamed of, but a normal feeling that gives us clues to understanding our unmet desires, unfulfilled potential, and prompting necessary change.

  • envy vs jealousy. Jealousy is possessiveness, envy is wanting what others have, or wanting to be them
  • becoming less envious of others as we get older
  • the emptiness at the heart of existence remains in place no matter who we are or what we have
  • house prices, salaries, wealth distribution
  • complex, changing feelings, hiding then reveal the path to self-growth
  • fitting in vs standing out
  • being the object of envy
  • being envious of contemporaries, such as friends, people we went to school or work with
  • having envy towards our own partners
  • bike shorts/yoga pants: acceptable clothing for everyone?
  • getting beneath the surface of desire, wanting a greater sense of freedom
  • gender and clothing: do women have greater freedom in terms of clothing?
  • 'painful but necessary steps'
  • Ali's dream of growing more of her own food
  • self-envy, a 'better version of ourself' from the past
  • Joe's epic case of personal envy towards a contemporary 
  • therapy: like cleaning a mirror, with the image becoming clearer over time. 
  • daily transformations that count towards personal growth
  • the importance of casual conversations for therapeutic value

Creators & Guests

  • Ali Catramados - Host
  • Joe Loh - Host
  • Sam Ellis - Host
    • (00:00) - Introduction and Welcome
  • (00:28) - Discussing Alain de Botton's Quote on Envy
  • (01:41) - Understanding Envy and Jealousy
  • (02:05) - Personal Experiences with Envy
  • (02:48) - Envy and Lifestyle Aspirations
  • (03:24) - Debate on Work and Lifestyle
  • (05:30) - Envy in Youth and Adulthood
  • (05:55) - Envy and Money
  • (08:49) - Envy of partners in relationships
  • (11:32) - Envy and Personal Style
  • (29:16) - The Illusion of Success
  • (29:24) - The Changing Landscape of Attainable Dreams
  • (30:04) - The Struggle with Identity and Expectations
  • (30:20) - The Reality of Career Success
  • (31:20) - The Shift in Perception of Wealth and Success
  • (32:32) - The Struggle with Personal Limitations
  • (33:34) - The Reality of Life's Unpredictability
  • (34:30) - The Desire for Freedom from Wage Slavery
  • (35:12) - The Struggle with Self-Blame and Helplessness
  • (37:36) - The Journey Towards Self-Reliance and Acceptance
  • (42:31) - The Power of Reflection and Self-Understanding

    • 00:00 Theme, intro
    00:28 Alain de Botton's Quote on Envy
    01:41 Understanding Envy and Jealousy
    02:05 Personal Experiences with Envy
    02:48 Envy and Lifestyle Aspirations
    03:24 Debate on Work and Lifestyle
    05:30 Envy in Youth and Adulthood
    05:55 Envy and Money
    08:49 Envy of partners in relationships
    11:32 Envy and Personal Style
    29:16 The Illusion of Success
    29:24 The Changing Landscape of Attainable Dreams
    30:04 The Struggle with Identity and Expectations
    30:20 The Reality of Career Success
    31:20 The Shift in Perception of Wealth and Success
    32:32 The Struggle with Personal Limitations
    33:34 The Reality of Life's Unpredictability
    34:30 The Desire for Freedom from Wage Slavery
    35:12 The Struggle with Self-Blame and Helplessness
    37:36 The Journey Towards Self-Reliance and Acceptance
    42:31 The Power of Reflection and Self-Understanding
    ...more
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    The Ten Thousand ThingsBy Sam Ellis, Joe Loh and Ali Catramados