Okay, the world is coronaviral and colleges are as close to figuring out if they should open their campuses as an Amish fourteen-year-old is to figuring out that nipples on women are more than just functional milk dots for boobies. 

But this episode is about education in general. Paying for it and getting it for free. I'm also a pessimist wrapped around a creamy optimistic center, and I believe that the future, although dark right now, will be a sunny day once again, when we can go to a baseball game, attend a concert, or have dinner with our parents and once again savor the ineffable pleasure of expressing our love by avoiding all talk about politics.