Welcome back to Bras Off Confessional — where Molly and Michaela work through their issues so you don't have to work through yours.

This week: teeth. Specifically the trauma, the horror, and the deeply unfortunate situations that arise when your mouth decides to betray you at the absolute worst possible moment.

Michaela has had more root canals than she'd like to count, a crown that did not survive contact with a pink Starburst, and a boyfriend who went into work late to find her tooth in the bedsheets. She was one month in. He passed the test.

Molly had oral surgery in college that her dentist botched so badly she spent months draining her own jaw with a syringe in a sorority house bathroom before nearly going septic on a two-hour drive home. She called five times. They told her it was fine. It was not fine. Enter: Rebecca Murphy with the full-on BDE.

And then there's the Clacker: A Tinder date. A PhD. Mississippi. Four front teeth that were not doing the one thing teeth should always do.

In this episode:

• Michaela's midnight Starburst crown incident and the man who found her tooth
• Molly's wisdom tooth saga: the infection, the gaslighting, and Rebecca Murphy
• Six feet of accordion gauze. 
• The Clacker. No further details, your honor.
• Can your dentist tell if you've tickled a pickle? Molly has thoughts.

Submit your tooth traumas, your retainer confessions, and your first date horror stories. Anonymous confessions always open.

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