I was recently reading the book Atomic Habits by James Clear and he points out that we are inclined to mimic the habits of those we spend the most time with, our community at large, and those we see as powerful. 
It got me reflecting on how much of my life is run by fear of the perceptions of others versus a practical consideration of those perceptions.
Here I reflect on examples of being negatively controlled by this question and how that changed to a more useful understanding.