Today we learn that Tory's corgi puppy is so cute, but is absolutely acquiring a taste for his flesh and blood. We also learn that when you get between Tyler and his sweet ice cream cone, he will aggressively threaten your life like an honest to goodness psychopath. To top it off, we finally answer the age old question: What happens if you die in a restaurant? With a special new Sword Watch, we finally conclude this epic tale that has been plaguing Baseless Claims for many moons.

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