From fake steak names to middle school fundraisers with toilet toys, Peaches is rolling into this Tuesday episode of Peaches Pit Party with the kind of high-energy chaos only he can deliver.

On today’s show:

• Whispering 311 continues with a surprisingly challenging lyric — and about four people failing before one guy finally guessed “Beautiful Disaster”
• An 81-year-old basketball coach gets fired after pulling a player's ponytail — Peaches shares old-school sports stories and gets nostalgic about being yelled at by coaches with zero chill
• Texas wants to rename the New York Strip to the Texas Strip. Peaches doesn’t care — he just wants easier meat
• TikTok claims massage guns can cause strokes (and Peaches is 100% freaked out now)
• A 5th grader raised $160 for school and was rewarded with… fake poop. School fundraisers have never been more tragic
• Instagram causes mental health problems, but Peaches is mostly using it like a digital scrapbook for memes and weird food photos
• RIP to the Idaho Falls water tower — there's a literal community tribute event happening and Peaches cannot handle it

Also:

• A Sleep Token rant Peaches posted in a SiriusXM fan group hits 500+ reactions and floods of people calling him “an idiot” (but some agreed)
• To Peach Their Own: “What’s something you’re totally fine missing out on, no matter what anyone says?” Answers include: sky coasters, the ocean, the gym, bungee jumping, and adulting in general
• A girl gets her entire fist stuck in her boyfriend’s mouth… yeah, you read that right
• And the Malcolm in the Middle reboot is coming — but Dewey’s been recast by a knockoff kid with Cartoon Network energy

Plus your Shot Clock Sports Update featuring:

• A guy getting a concussion in the bullpen during batting practice
• Mookie Betts launching a pro bowling team
• And a minor league baseball logo that accidentally looks wildly inappropriate

All that, and the deep betrayal of room temperature water.