This week’s episode is a certified circus. The government said “figure it out” as SNAP benefits vanish but DoorDash said “we got you” with free meals. Paramount’s restructuring again by cutting jobs, China wants influencers to have diplomas now, and Luigi Mangione is a Lil Durk fan. Drake and Stake are getting sued for “deceptive gambling”. A couple robbed a bank on their first date, love that for them. Oh, and Diddy’s got a release date and Stefon Diggs allegedly has twins on the way, because apparently everyone’s making headlines but the government.

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