How I Met My Co-Founder

Ep 1.9 • AMA: Couples Therapy for Co-Founders | Guest Host, Crystelle Desnoyer


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Ask Me Anything: Couples Therapy for Co-Founders — Former Techstars Chief of Staff, Crystelle Desnoyer, interviewing Co-Founder Relationship Expert, Annie Garofalo

In this bonus episode of 'How I Met My Co-Founder,' guest host Crystelle Desnoyer, former Chief of Staff to the CEO of Techstars, switches roles to interview show host Annie Garofalo about her unique specialization in supporting co-founder relationships. Drawing from her personal experience of co-founding a startup, Annie delves into how differences in definitions and expectations can create challenges even in the strongest of friendships. The discussion covers the importance of proactive communication, the nuanced process of setting up co-founder agreements, and various conflict management strategies. Annie shares insights from her academic research at Stanford and her work with 50 early-stage teams backed by leading investors. Together, they explore the complexities of co-founder dynamics, the role of cultural backgrounds, and when it might be best for co-founders to part ways. Essential takeaways include the value of upfront conversations, structured feedback, and creating a 'pilot phase' to test co-founder compatibility.

Crystelle’s Takeaways:

Communicate, communicate, communicate!

  • Try to anticipate and discuss as much as you can upfront

  • Put everything in writing to prevent miscommunication

  • Be honest with yourself, be honest with the other person - whether you know them really well or not at all

  • When co-founder ‘dating’ always do a pilot — a high risk, high yield kind of situation in order to really get to know one another.

    Get full access to podcast summaries and founding team research and resources by subscribing to the newsletter at www.confidante.substack.com

    References & Resources:

    • Non-Violent Communication (Book): https://www.cnvc.org/store/nonviolent-communication-a-language-of-life

    • Permission to Feel (Book): https://marcbrackett.com/permission-to-feel/

    • Piloting Your Co-Founder Relationship: https://confidante.substack.com/p/trial-period-for-cofounders

    Where to find Crystelle Desnoyer: https://www.linkedin.com/in/crystelle-desnoyer-09882629/

    Where to find Annie Garofalo, host and startup team relationship expert:

    Website: https://www.confidante.info

    Newsletter: https://confidante.substack.com

    LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/annie-garofalo/

    Instagram: https://instagram.com/thecofounderconfidante
    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@the.cofounder.confidante
    Twitter: https://twitter.com/anniegarofal0
    YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheCoFounderConfidante

    In this episode, we cover:

    00:00 Episode Highlights

    00:40 Introduction and Role Reversal

    00:43 Our Guest Host: Crystelle's Background

    01:59 Annie's Journey into Co-Founder Relationships

    04:22 The Importance of Upfront Conversations

    05:39 The Co-Founder Prenup

    06:14 Communication and Willingness

    08:28 Conflict Management Strategies

    10:11 Couples and Close Friends as Co-Founders

    11:17 Handling Hard Conversations

    12:17 Feedback and Check-Ins

    16:40 Cultural Differences in Conflict Resolution

    18:33 When to Consider Breaking Up

    21:04 Criteria for Working with Co-Founders

    22:27 Advice for New Co-Founders

    28:14 Summary and Closing Thoughts

    Podcast produced by www.confidante.info. For inquiries about sponsoring the podcast, email [email protected]. Annie may be an investor, advisor, or coach for the companies discussed.

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    How I Met My Co-FounderBy Annie Garofalo