How do shadow and relationship work?

Your shadow self-perpetuates your fears. Every time your fear is getting triggered, what the fear does is it goes out looking into the world to find evidence to prove that it's true. That's natural.

Fear does not get defeated through rationality. The way to get out of this is to distinguish that this is all just fear. In a relationship, your partner's fear is simply the reciprocal of yours. You can't help yourselves, and that is the nature of being in a relationship, you pull each other back. Every time one tries to step outside, the other will pull you in. Listen as you discover how shadow and relationship fit and how it works.