Sean: And would you say negotiation is more of convincing from a logical standpoint whereas you mentioned earlier, I have a team we've worked well together and that might justify a higher value for the contract that I'm selling, or would you rather go for a more logical approach where you would say with, with this team that I have, you're going to be more comfortable.

You're going to be safe. Because we all know how to work with each other already. Which one would you lean more towards the rational, logical side or the emotional side when negotiating?

Mark: Well, those are both rational arguments. If you say we're going to be a better team or we connect better or communicate better, that's a logical argument, even though you're arguing, there is a better emotional component to it.

Now you can use rational arguments and most of what you should do when you're a novice negotiator, focus on that. Focus on logical arguments. And it's always about what you want. It doesn't matter what I want. I might want a million dollars. I might think I deserve a million dollars, but if you don't believe that, it doesn't matter what I want, what I think. I have to convince you. Here's a reason why a million's justified based on my experience, the value I bring.

Now, there are times when you do want to get emotional. I don't talk quite as much about this in the book. There are other books. So Chris Voss, I think has a book on this topic. I haven't read it.

He was the FBI negotiator, their lead negotiator. So the FBI, the federal bureau of investigations, he's dealing with some gunmen, who's taken a hostage, I'm doing business deals. I'm saying, this is why you should pay $50 million for this company. Here's why it's going to justify the value. We're doing this over hours, days, weeks, most likely.

And we know we can walk away from the table. We'll take this up next week. When you have a hostage negotiator, it is all emotional. There's no logical appeal. He might bring in a little of that, but he knows you're playing to their emotions. You do sometimes have that in business.

I was just advising someone on dealing with a co-founder. I said, look, logically, you should be able to do more, but everything you're telling me about your co-founder. Your co-founder is not going to behave rationally. Your co-founder just views this in a certain way. And he's going to draw a line in the sand for emotional reasons, and you have to decide, can you live with that or not?

So we do sometimes even businesses have to recognize there may just be an emotional tie, an emotional limit, but I would say for many of us start up just focusing on those logical arguments.

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