Yo Alexa is tired, stressed (and a lil depressed) but aren't we all? But really, she's goin through it trying to get her ducks in a row before going to Seattle. She goes off on a tangent about the perfect way to cook a mellow. Pay attention, because it's some good shit. She also ends up sharing some secrets about her short butt crack. The secret being she has one. A very short one. Alexa talks about the "dress like a dad in his 20's" get together she went to recently. You can see some amazing photos of that on Instagram @alexastantoncomedy or the video on Youtube. For the news segment, we learn about a man swinging his colostomy bag around in Kid Rock's Restaurant, Cicadas that will be invading the midwest, and a man who smuggled singing finches into NYC. Enjoy, bitches.