Who knew we'd come out of these chapters wishing we had Phineas Nigellus as a life coach? This week, Harry puts the Grim in Grimmauld; Arthur experiments with alternative medicine; Hermione ruins her family's Christmas; Ginny reminds everyone that Book 2 happened; Gilderoy learns cursive; and Snape preaches closed-mindedness. Plus: Wow is Ron even in this book?

This week's chapters: Christmas on the Closed Ward & Occlumency

Next week's chapters: The Beetle at Bay & Seen and Unforeseen