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Ep. 56 - When Choosing to Leave
Some times in marriage, you have to choose to leave… but how do you know when that time has come?
In my training as a life coach, and by looking back at my previously failed marriage, I’ve learned the following, very valuable lessons:
* I thought of myself only as a blameless “victim” in the relationship. Looking back, I was wrong.
* I had been a co-creator of my circumstances, but thought of it completely as my husband’s “doing this to me.”
* I didn’t have the tools needed to help my marriage succeed, but I thought I knew exactly what HE needed to do.
* I believed my husband was full of faults, sadly focusing only on those faults… forgetting why I had married him.
* I falsely believed that my complete happiness depended on my husband doing certain things, or being a certain way, trying to control him
That being said, I left (twice), when I started to feel that things would never change, and that they were becoming unsafe for us, both physically and mentally.
Watch movies about women having gone through what you’re going through to help you evaluate your situation. Often we can’t see what’s going on with us until we see it happening to someone else.
Movies:
For Colored Girls, on Amazon Prime Video
What’s Love Got to Do with It, on Amazon Prime Video
Enough
Lou, on Netflix
Things to consider in your marriage when thinking of leaving:
* Do you feel unsafe? If you do, seek help right away… from a trusted source that can actually help you.
If you know you need to leave, it may not be easy but trust your instincts. Only you know what your situation is.
* You feel safe AND wish to make the marriage work, listen to the last two episodes
If you need to talk to someone, I’m here… I can help you! Please reach out and let’s put it all on the table and see what you have to work with.
Mentioned in this episode:
Ep 53 Marriage: End 2022 IN Love
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ep-53-marriage-end-2022-in-love/id1597656935?i=1000587904091
Ep 54 How to Know You Have An Amazing Husband
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ep-54-how-to-know-you-have-an-amazing-husband/id1597656935?i=1000589006595
Ep 55 Happy Wife, Happy Life
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ep-55-happy-wife-happy-life/id1597656935?i=1000590008492
The Happy Wife, Happy Life Coaching Program:
I have a couple of spots available for 1:1 coaching, sign up here:
https://winning-pioneer-7621.ck.page/products/convert-kit-training
or click link on IG Bio @women.rising.together. First come first served, don’t delay have the best marriage ever!
Let’s connect on social media!
INSTAGRAM: @women.rising.together
https://www.instagram.com/women.rising.together/
PRIVATE & FREE FACEBOOK COMMUNITY: WomenRisingTogether2021
Women Rising Together | Facebook
View all episodes
By Addie ScharffSome times in marriage, you have to choose to leave… but how do you know when that time has come?
In my training as a life coach, and by looking back at my previously failed marriage, I’ve learned the following, very valuable lessons:
* I thought of myself only as a blameless “victim” in the relationship. Looking back, I was wrong.
* I had been a co-creator of my circumstances, but thought of it completely as my husband’s “doing this to me.”
* I didn’t have the tools needed to help my marriage succeed, but I thought I knew exactly what HE needed to do.
* I believed my husband was full of faults, sadly focusing only on those faults… forgetting why I had married him.
* I falsely believed that my complete happiness depended on my husband doing certain things, or being a certain way, trying to control him
That being said, I left (twice), when I started to feel that things would never change, and that they were becoming unsafe for us, both physically and mentally.
Watch movies about women having gone through what you’re going through to help you evaluate your situation. Often we can’t see what’s going on with us until we see it happening to someone else.
Movies:
For Colored Girls, on Amazon Prime Video
What’s Love Got to Do with It, on Amazon Prime Video
Enough
Lou, on Netflix
Things to consider in your marriage when thinking of leaving:
* Do you feel unsafe? If you do, seek help right away… from a trusted source that can actually help you.
If you know you need to leave, it may not be easy but trust your instincts. Only you know what your situation is.
* You feel safe AND wish to make the marriage work, listen to the last two episodes
If you need to talk to someone, I’m here… I can help you! Please reach out and let’s put it all on the table and see what you have to work with.
Mentioned in this episode:
Ep 53 Marriage: End 2022 IN Love
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ep-53-marriage-end-2022-in-love/id1597656935?i=1000587904091
Ep 54 How to Know You Have An Amazing Husband
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ep-54-how-to-know-you-have-an-amazing-husband/id1597656935?i=1000589006595
Ep 55 Happy Wife, Happy Life
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ep-55-happy-wife-happy-life/id1597656935?i=1000590008492
The Happy Wife, Happy Life Coaching Program:
I have a couple of spots available for 1:1 coaching, sign up here:
https://winning-pioneer-7621.ck.page/products/convert-kit-training
or click link on IG Bio @women.rising.together. First come first served, don’t delay have the best marriage ever!
Let’s connect on social media!
INSTAGRAM: @women.rising.together
https://www.instagram.com/women.rising.together/
PRIVATE & FREE FACEBOOK COMMUNITY: WomenRisingTogether2021
Women Rising Together | Facebook