Dr. Lily Zehner, MFT-C, specializes in sex, intimacy and relationships. In this episode, we explore the journey that led her to developing her unique set of skills.

“I often tell people that I have thick skin and a tender heart. It takes a tender heart to really work with the people I’m working with and to really understand what is going on and what is felt and what is needed, but thick skin because there is so much shame and so much judgement.”

In the household that Lily grew up, sex was considered the devil, dirty and wrong – but she always had a curiosity about sex and sexual expression.

She also grew up divided between different identities.

• She is a first-generation American
• She is hearing, but her parents’ are deaf
• She grew up in an upper-middle class neighborhood, but she grew up poor
• She is a person of color, but surrounded by white people

“Understanding how these different parts of my identity intersect and how that impacts how I show up in the world and how I experience things – it really is a big part of how I show up in the room with my clients.”

There’s many layers to her identity and her experiences that don’t necessarily fit together, and all of it combines to influence her true calling in life.

She has come to realize that her true calling is to create a space where she can be show up for people and allow them the space to really be who they are, honor who they are, explore who they are, discover who they are, and share themselves with others.

“Give yourself permission to show up in this world exactly as who you are – whatever that may be, without shame, unapologetically – and know that, the more we all do that, the better we will be.”

I really respect the awesome work that Lily is doing. I think she’ll help a lot of people, which will in turn help change society’s perception of sex and sexuality for the better. You can get in touch with Lily at DrLilyZehner.com.

 

Resources:

• Get in touch with Lily at DrLilyZehner.com
• The Ethical Slut by Dossie Easton & Janet Hardy

 

Interested in learning more about how I can help you through coaching?  Find out more at www.johnharrisoncounseling.com/individual-coaching/

 

Production & Development for True Calling Project by Podcast Masters