Hi friends!

I’m thrilled to finally be able to share my interview with my dear friend Valerie Finlay, and share her journey through many years of school with a growing family in the middle of it all.

Valerie graduated from Brigham Young University in Special Education and now has five beautiful children. She has supported her husband through a master’s degree and medical school training and now residency. They have moved many times, and she shares great tips of how they strengthened their marriage throughout this journey.

Valerie shared how she was pregnant during her last year of her Bachelor’s Degree, she went straight to her professors and let them know that she was pregnant and started working with them. While they didn’t give her any slack, they made arrangements with her as her pregnancy progressed. We talked about the importance of speaking up! At vulnerable times, we sometimes think that we “should” be able to work it out, but it’s really important to take care of yourself.

As she moved around in her childhood, Valerie remembered the advice her mom used to give her. She told her to not expect people to come up to you and be your friend, you have to go and make friends. She kept practicing that and was successful for the next six moves as an adult.

When I asked Valerie about her journey supporting her husband through medical school, she mentioned that they always valued being a team. They were both in this together. It wasn’t just him that was in medical school. She said the first six weeks of medical school were the hardest because they were both really overwhelmed. She began to get to know the third year students and spouses and got great advice from them, and also joined a Facebook group with other med school spouses in the area.

Valerie was first to say that she didn’t know her journey would lead to adoption at the busiest time of her life, but her husband always wanted to adopt, and there was a time when they both felt like they should get certified in foster care. This led to many miracles as COVID hit, and they adopted two boys and had another baby three weeks after that. They became a family of five in two weeks.

Her best advice is that you’ll make it! You’re stronger than you think you are! Even if medical school or the direction you’re going doesn’t work out, you can still move forward! Asking for help is so important, and people will step up to help you.

Listen to the full podcast for more gems about embracing your journey.

Happy listening!

Celeste

Here is the YouTube link. This podcast has been published on all podcast platforms for your convenience!

Get full access to My Allomother at myallomother.substack.com/subscribe