Tommy was 12 years old, drowning in the grief of his father abandoning the family, and instead of reaching out, he started lying about everything. His mother was devastated. She told me, “I raised him to tell the truth, and now he’s a liar.”

But Tommy wasn’t a bad kid. He was a kid who learned that the truth felt dangerous.

We think we’re raising honest children by being strict, but often we’re just training them to hide better. When every mistake is met with a lecture, losing their phone, or a parent’s anger, honesty becomes too expensive for a child to afford. They stop asking, “Is this right?” and start asking, “Will I get caught?”

In this episode, I explain how fear replaces a child’s internal conscience, why punishment often makes lying worse, and what to do instead when you catch your child in a lie. The goal isn’t less accountability. It’s building connection and credibility so your child learns to listen to themselves, not just manage you.

Listen here to learn how to stop becoming an enemy to your child’s conscience and start becoming the safe place they turn to when they mess up. The shift isn’t more control. It’s reclaiming the influence you already have.

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Want more than just tips? My parenting course, Connection & Credibility, helps you build a strong bond with your kids while setting healthy boundaries that actually work. Explore the course: https://correctandconnect.com/courses/connection-credibility/

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