Change Your Mindset

Ep. 77 - Colin Blalock | It’s Not What You Say That is Heard: Why Reading Body Language is Fun & Profitable


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Colin Blalock, a shareholder with Jones and Kolb, is a CPA with a very unique set of skills: Colin has developed a talent for understanding the nonverbal messages that people are saying. That's right – He has developed the ability to read body language, and he has delivered a number of conference presentations on this topic.

 

The importance of reading body language is underscored when you understand how people are interpreting your message: 7 percent is what you say, 38 percent is how you say it (the tone of your voice), and 55 percent is silent body language.

 

But a lot of us don't take the time to think about our own body language, and that limits how effectively we can communicate with others – or understand what they’re really communicating to us.

 

Colin’s Challenge & Body Language Cheat Sheet

 

For the next 30 days, when you get up in the morning, read this cheat sheet – the 13 keys of body language – and try to identify these things during your day. What you see, and learn, will absolutely blow you away.

 

Key #1  - Initial Meeting

  • Plan
  • Flash/return flash
  • Eye contact
  • Smile

 

Key #2  - Spacing

  • Personal space
  • Correct distance

 

Key #3 - Conflicts

  • Unknown male/female (standing and sitting)
  • Standing vs. sitting
  • Avoid deep armchairs

 

Key #4 - The Handshake

  • Pressure/length
  • Limp wrist
  • Dominate (counter)
  • Get together
  • Submissive
  • Glove
  • Double touch
  • Shoulder grip

 

Key #5 - Appearance

  • Glasses
  • Best face forward

 

Key #6 - Cooperation/Acceptance

  • Head tilt
  • Eye contact
  • Smile
  • Speaking to a group – contact

 

Key #7 - Power Plays

  • Control time/space
  • The stare – counter
  • Where you sit

 

Key #8 - Reading Others

  • Watch for leakage
  • Read my lips
  • Furrowed forehead
  • Buy signs
  • Watch the feet
  • True smile
  • Copying stance/gestures

 

Key #9 - Common Lying Gestures

  • No single sign
  • The nose knows
  • Gravity defying gestures and happy feet

 

Key #10 - Watch the Hands

  • Touching objects
  • Palms up/down

 

Key #11 - What about the Eyes?

  • Audio (side to side)
  • Calculating (down and left)
  • Emotional (down and right)
  • Deception (up and right)
  • Recalling (up and left)

 

Key #12 - Common Barriers

  • Arm fold
  • One arm fold
  • How to break the barrier

 

Key #13 - Practice!

 

 


Colin’s Favorite Body Language Books:

  • Telling Lies, Paul Ekman
    • Extremely hard to read, but many books use his research.
    • Unless you really like Calculus I would pass.
  • The Secret Language of Success, David Lewis
    • First book I read, 31 rules provides a good foundation;

 

  • The book cost $0.01 and shipping is $4.24.  Accountants love rules and there are 31 Rules to follow.  Note: three books below cover many of the same points.

 

  • The Definitive Book of Body Language, Allan and Barbara Pease
    • Excellent book and discusses issues up through former President Clinton;
    • Entertaining and useful.
  • What Every BODY is Saying, Joe Navarro
    • Real life experiences working with soldiers captured in the Gulf Wars and how the same techniques are applied to interactions today;
    • Works with Fortune 500 companies now;
    • Addresses benchmarking.
  • Let Me See Your Body Talk, Jan Hargrave
    • Very good book for singles;
    • Explains social interactions.
  • The Silent Language of Leaders, Carol Kinsey Goman
    • Excellent book if preside over meetings or need to get a consensus from a group on issues;
    • Explains why some people “lead” and no one follows.

--

 

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Change Your MindsetBy Peter Margaritis, CPA & C-Suite Radio

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