Mike and Alex are back during the least productive time of the year—where brackets are busted, work is optional, and the only real priority is not finishing last and having to cook dinner for everyone else.

March Madness is wrapping up, The Masters is here, playoffs are looming, baseball is back… and absolutely nothing is getting done. Mike is locked in on the real headline of The Masters (the egg salad sandwiches), while Kate prepares for the inevitable gas-related consequences. The guys also workshop whether Augusta should lean into chaos and just add deviled eggs to the menu.

Somehow, a drone made its way into the Final Four (indoors??), which sparks a completely reasonable discussion about Olympic drone racing and why skeleton athletes probably need them most. Meanwhile, the podcast reaches a new level of maturity—by admitting they desperately need a research department… or just more AI.

Spring has arrived way too early, yard work is already undefeated, and the guys are exhausted. But nothing compares to the ultimate mystery: how does Tiger keep finding himself in DUI situations when he has unlimited money, access, and presumably the ability to never drive again? The math simply doesn't add up.

Elsewhere, Cooper is deep into "Senior Assassin," a game that feels wildly more illegal than anyone remembers high school being. The guys wonder how many felonies are being casually committed in the name of victory, and reflect on their own version—BB gun wars—which somehow felt both simpler and more painful.

It's sports, stupidity, questionable life choices, and egg salad-fueled chaos—just the way you like it.