Episode 18: Inner Critic

Lindsay’s story- Lindsay had a minor meltdown about not doing enough. Where did this come from? She does so much? Well seems like her inner critic got the best of her! 

What does your inner critic tell you? Inner critic can come off in so many ways. It can be about not taking enough action, it can be the little voice telling you that you are not good enough. Well guess what? You are good enough and you dont deserve this little jerk telling you that you are not enough. 

The 1 in 100 - If there are 100 people in a room who love and support you, and one person who doesnt love and support you, Where does your attention go? To that ONE person, right? Same girl! 

Juliet calls her inner critic, her inner jerk-- and we love that here!

Psychology Today helps us!: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/201903/silencing-your-inner-critic

When we start to pay attention, we notice how quickly the critic jumps in.

“There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” ~William Shakespeare

Once you hear your inner critic, it takes major work to silence it. You have to take away its power and regain your own.

Step 1: Try to identify what your critical inner voice is telling you. Acknowledge that this thought process is separate from your real point of view. Remember that your critical inner voice is not a reflection of reality. It is a viewpoint you adopted based on destructive early life experiences and attitudes directed toward you that you've internalized as your own point of view.

Step 2: One way to help you differentiate 

from your critical inner voice is to write these thoughts down in the second person (as "you" statements). For example, a thought like "I can't get anything right. I'll never be successful" should be written as "You can't get anything right. You'll never be successful." This will help you see these thoughts as an alien point of view and not as true statements. Notice how hostile this internal enemy can be.

Step 3: You can respond to your inner critic by writing down a more realistic and compassionate evaluation of yourself. Write these responses in the first person (as "I" statements). In response to a thought like, "You're such an idiot," you could write, "I may struggle at times, but I am smart and competent in many ways." This exercise isn't meant to build you up or boost your ego but to show a kinder, more honest attitude toward yourself.

Step 4: Remember not to act on the directives of your inner critic. Take actions that represent your own point of view, who you want to be and what you aim to achieve. Your critical inner voice may get louder, telling you to stay in line or not to take chances. However, by identifying, separating from, and acting against this destructive thought process, you will grow stronger, while your inner critic grows weaker.

When the inner critic starts pounding away, know that your inner nurturer is a refuge and an ally.

Try regarding your inner critic as something that lacks credibility — imagine it as a ridiculous character, like a silly cartoon villain.

Argue against your inner critic, and truly intend to win.

Recognize your own good qualities, and label them in your mind with phrases such as “trying hard”; “admitting a mistake”; or “enduring when things are tough.”

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