In this too-long first-ever episode, Shannon and Jake break down Robert Egger's delightfully weird film The Lighthouse, starring Robert Pattinson and Willem Dafoe. It's a salty and bleak tale of two dipshits stuck on an island together, and so visceral a story of isolation that you won't believe it was made before COVID. With enough masturbation scenes, shakespearean monologues, and mermaid labia to last four lifetimes, this movie ensures Skeleton Closet starts off on the weirdest note possible.

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